momzen

Birthday Presents!

2011-07-04T11:53:00.002-05:00

This is what I got for my birthday. (For my friends who aren't on FB)

:)

?

2011-07-02T10:18:00.001-05:00

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Is it illegal to be a kid in this town?

2011-03-21T17:53:00.001-05:00

Your thoughts please... Yesterday I received a phone call from the local law enforcement asking, "did I know where my (10 & 12 year-old) kids were?"

I answered "unless something unusual happened, they are either at Target or on their way home from there."

Apparently they were stopped for being unaccompanied children. Because that is so abnormal. (I did question them about what they were doing; they assured me separately that all they were doing was walking).

I guess it was a good thing for all of us that they were where I expected them. The officer let them go.

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Books, Libraries & Reading

2011-02-20T08:17:00.003-06:00

I am very pleased to have developed three readers (so far) in my family. Trips to the library have been well received lately. Here is a story for each boy...

J has been making origami things for quite awhile. He was at the section where they had instruction books, and complained that they all had the same thing, and he already knew how to do all of them. So I introduced him to the stacks... We found the section on paper folding (for adults) and he practically jumped out of his skin, he was so excited. He picked out about five new books. The next week he figured out to ask for help with books on another subject he's excited about - knives. (But that's another story).

R seems to have about four books going at any given time. He does not feel the need to finish one before he sets out on another one. He is forever asking for bookmarks (I think he forgets to take them out of the books when he's done with them). He happily identifies himself as a "book worm." Last night we discussed the subject of one book, that reminded me of another book (and another author). I am happy to say that he is right this minute reading a Hugo/Nebula award winner (Ender's Game).

A is in first grade, and his world has just recently opened up to reading. It is so much fun to watch him figure things out. One of my favorite authors of all time (Spider Robinson) once wrote that his mother would read stories to him, and at the most exciting part, suddenly have something important to do in the kitchen (leaving him alone with the book). With that encouragement, he learned to read. So I've done the same thing with A. And it has worked beautifully.

The really funny part is that he was committed to reading his book (Animorphs - about a second or third grade level book), but didn't want to read his assigned book for class (20 pages - 40 sentences, plus or minus). I made him put down the hard book to read the easy one - but then wrote a letter to his teacher explaining how wrong that felt. We both agreed to give him something more challenging. He's reading a "Nate the Great" book every two or three days now. And Animorphs.

E is 5 and is learning his letter sounds. Montessori education focuses on the sound of the letter prior to the name of it ("ah" instead of "ay"). He's got most of them down and can read individual words (with pictures to help). I can't wait to see him develop this skill too.

Special bonus (for me). When we were at the library last week, I found not one, but two books by two different authors for two different series where they had not written anything new in years. I got both. Such a treat.

In appreciation of children

2011-02-19T07:50:00.003-06:00

Conversations between E & A
Where did dinosaurs live?
In the desert.
No, cowboys live there.
Dinosaurs died because humans live here now.

A's question this morning
Where do fish go in the winter?
The same place they go in summer.
But what about when it snows?

Mornings
Even though I think the younger boys are probably old enough to wake themselves up to get ready for school, I don't mind participating. My "payment" for participating is that I get snuggle time. And during snuggle time, I get to hold them and touch their soft smooth skin. And boy oh boy do they have wonderful skin. Yum!

R has decided that he doesn't like his alarm clock and would rather I wake him up personally. And so, even though he is ten, I still do. Ten years old and still wants a hug from his mama in the morning. In fact, he is still quite the snuggler. I wonder how long it will last. I think J stopped around age 11. R may last longer.

J
It amazes me to watch my oldest move from "little boy" to adolescent. He is everything all the books/magazines talk about - with wild mood swings, infuriating obnoxiousness, and delightful inventions, often within three minutes of one another. Four more months and he will be an official teenager. (Which marks the beginning of a 12 year cycle that I will have at least one teenage boy in my home).

Yesterday dirt & mulch & plants arrived to be worked into the landscape and garden. All of the boys (except E) pitched in to help (with the promise of monetary reward). They were all so cheerful and willing. Kind of surprised me. In a good way.

Wonder if it will last through today - 'cause there is a lot more to be done.

Firsts

2011-01-24T16:18:00.000-06:00

First fish. Caught w/Dad. Anyone know what kind?

Word of the Year

2011-01-17T17:33:00.003-06:00

I am feeling a little slow this year. But I was inspired to make a Vision Board recently...

Apparently my word is "Boing." Which I think is about having more fun and finding stuff that gives me energy.

Secondarily, "Ahhhh." Which I'm pretty sure is about both enjoying life more and relaxing.

Checking out the neighbour's dogs...

2010-11-23T13:34:00.001-06:00

Working at uploading photos I've taken over the last few months. This is in our backyard.

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Creative Child

2010-11-22T14:23:00.001-06:00

R discovered that if you grind up the small remnants of chalk and rub it all over your hands, you can pretend to be an Avatar.

And if you have one or more younger brothers, they can play too.

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Test post

2010-11-21T12:46:00.001-06:00

From the droid... What happens when 4 year-olds fill the dishwasher.

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Ob La Di... Life Goes On...

2010-11-08T14:38:00.002-06:00

I seem to have gotten out of the habit of writing. Not just here, but journal writing and working on my book seem to be lacking as well. I made a practice to write every day for a week, and came up with nothing much.

It's finally fall here in Louisiana. I wore jeans for the first time this week. And my red boots. (Which are completely awesome and I want to wear every day).

Kids are pretty well resigned to wearing uniforms at school. J has figured out that he can get away with t-shirts if they have the name of his school on them. Halloween has come and gone. (See my facebook profile for their picture).

Hanukkah begins on December 1 this year and I'm a little bit panicked around how I will get gifts in time. We've got some ideas, but finding time to go shopping when boys aren't around (and both Tom and I are together) isn't easy. Especially when we don't think about it until 5pm on a Sunday night.

We started religious school at the temple. But forgot to get board approval and go through the appropriate channels. Working on that now. Sometimes it's easier to just go ahead and do things and deal with the fall out.

Missing friends around the world, in Denver, Houston and Paris.

I have an alcove in my bedroom in which I've hung all of my Paris artwork. (I have a painting of the Arch de Triomphe, a photo of the Louvre, two photos of art from inside the Louvre, two ink drawings, and an embroidered pillow. It's a nice place to hang out.

This week we are taking a short vacation to Galveston Island to celebrate T's birthday. I think a little beach time will be lovely. Gotta get to the library first so we all have good reads.

I'll try to get into the habit of posting again. And will figure out how to upload photos from my phone - cause that's where all the good ones are!

Keep in touch!

Home is... Judaism?

2010-09-20T08:42:00.002-05:00

In the last three weeks, I have spent more time in the company of Jews, doing singularly Jewish things, than I have done in the last twelve months. First, I went to Colorado to witness my brother's Bar Mitzvah - a coming of age ceremony, usually celebrated at the age of 13. Saturday was Yom Kippur, the final part of the Jewish New Year celebration which began ten days prior (Sept 8) with Rosh Hashana.

For those unfamiliar with Judaism, my basic understanding is that Rosh Hashana is a celebration of gratitude that we made it through the previous year. After the ceremony, we eat apples and honey to start the next year off on a sweet note.

Then we spend the next ten days (the Days of Awe), contemplating the previous year and cleaning up our affairs - recognizing when we didn't quite live up to our expectations of ourselves (and god), and asking forgiveness from people we had wronged.

At the end of this ten-day period, we go into Yom Kippur, which is known as the Day of Atonement. Beginning the night before, we fast, spend the day apologizing for all the things we have done wrong, and begging god's forgiveness. We also pray for the following year to be a good one for us and our families.

While Yom Kippur is a relatively somber occasion, I find the liturgy to be both beautiful and deeply touching. It is less about how we are outwardly, and more about whether we are experiencing and sharing the love and joy in which we were created.

And yet, during the entire morning service (two hours plus), I was in tears. This last year (from September to September) has been incredibly chaotic for me. This time last year, I was in the company of Jews from around the world in the middle of Paris. I had no inkling of the craziness that would be coming. It was a time of peace for me, feeling (finally) completely at home in France, having lived there a year. So many good things were happening.

Now here I am in this new/old location, feeling homesick for a place I had left nine months ago, and also strangely at home here. The thoughts I had went something like this: Oh the last year has sucked so badly; I miss Paris; I miss my friends; I've lived three places in the last 12 months; I am so pissed that we had to leave; where can I find peace?; did I have to leave Paris to find it?; I don't want to stop being angry about leaving; but I want to be happy. I don't want this to be the place I am happiest. I don't want this place to be home. Yet here is everyone welcoming me with open arms. What does home mean, anyway?

Whew!

So now it' s Monday, and I am still musing. What does it mean to be home? Can home be in more than one place? Can I love here and still wish I was elsewhere?

One of my teachers would surely say that I can find home in the liturgy of my religion. I wonder if that is what will happen. As I get older, and move more and more often, maybe my home will be Judaism. I find that surprising, but also hopeful.

Got religion?

2010-08-28T08:20:00.004-05:00

There is a temple here that has been around for over a hundred years. When we lived here before, I attended sporadically. Being a small town in the south, rabbis are a little hard to come by. There was a woman rabbi here when we first arrived in 1998, but she was gone within a year or two. Then there was a retired rabbi from Chicago who flew in once or twice a month for awhile. Right now there is no rabbi at all, so all the services are lay-led.

I went to services last night by myself, and last week with all the kids. We were warmly welcomed and remembered. Nice feeling.

Since I've been gone from this place, I have deepened my understanding and appreciation for Judiasm. When in France I became a part of the community of moms at the temple program for kids. In Sugarland (the first time), I became a member of the sisterhood and attended various events. I even started celebrating Shabbat in the home a couple of times a month.

Now, that I am here in a place without a *leader*, I find that I am very drawn to participe.

I have been looking for a place where I feel at home and connected to a community. I think this is going to be one of those places. (I'm starting to think about activities I could host, and how to get the kids involved.) This could be great for us. For me.

Short post

2010-08-23T09:21:00.002-05:00

Hi folks,

Still here. Now live from Lake Charles, Louisiana. It's been a wild ride and probably the worst moving experience ever - combine BAD packers with SICK husband, then add stuff I put into storage two years ago plus kids who are tired of each other, and you'll get a sense of the craziness.

School started last week. Aside from the uniforms (yuck) and homework (double-yuck), I think the kids are settling into a routine. I am still looking for it. Should be easier once we get internet at the house. (Today, I hope).

I've got new phone numbers (and a new smart phone - yay!) If you want 'em, send me an email or FB post and I'll pass them on.

Two Steps Forward; One Step Back

2010-08-09T10:13:00.003-05:00

As I sit here, there are four people in my house packing everything into boxes. I am feeling rather sad. But it is not about leaving HERE. It feels more like the final "nail in the coffin" of our expat life being over.

We were supposed to be going to Korea. We were supposed to have an exciting adventure. We were supposed to be living my childhood dream of seeing the world.

But what we're actually doing is moving BACKWARDS. To a place we've already lived. To a job T has already done (more or less). To (one) school we're already familiar with.

I am trying to keep a positive attitude. There are many things I like about Lake Charles. I am definitely looking forward to teaching Jazzercise and going to the Yoga studio in town.

I can see this as part of the dance where you take one step back in order to change direction. I am aware of all the possibilities and potential...

But right now, I am mostly just sad.

Counting Down the Days

2010-08-02T21:49:00.002-05:00

Today was Monday. Nothing in particular to do, so I brought the kids to a movie. Lots of whining about "I don't want to see that," followed by "wow, that was great." (Toy Story 3).

Tomorrow and Wednesday I send the kids to day camp. I see no reason for them to hang around the house. While they're gone, I get to exercise, get a haircut & run errands. On Wednesday they get their dentist appointment too. (Oh so much excitement I can hardly stand it).

On Thursday I pack up the kids and drive to Lake Charles. We spend the night, then close on the house on Friday.

We drive back Friday afternoon (in two separate vehicles), and spend Saturday and Sunday preparing for the packers to arrive at the house. Since there is a lot of stuff in the house we are leaving (either it belongs to the owners of the house, or we are leaving it for our cleaning gal), there is going to be a lot of signs put up that say "NO."

On Monday the pack/movers are coming & once they're done, we are too. Off to Lake Charles. A week in the hotel (plus or minus), and then life begins again.

I am both looking forward to it, and dreading it at the same time. Mostly I think it just moves us that much closer to school starting, and routines to get back to normal. (Oh how I miss "normal!")

Working Out

2010-07-14T20:44:00.002-05:00

I had the surgery on my foot three and a half weeks ago. I had to walk in a boot for three weeks, but now it's off. I have been exercising at a place called the PLEX. It is a place where professional athletes work out, and it's been a lot of fun. The trainers are outstanding, and know how to give you a good workout within your limitations.

So, I have been doing a lot of upper-body strength training, but not much leg work. Which makes me very happy about how my arms/shoulders/back look, but disappointed in lower body stuff.

On the other hand, I have made arrangements to *finally* begin teaching Jazzercise again in August. I figure once I am released to full activity, I will be able to build up my strength and stamina again. I am a little nervous, but I like having a goal.

The cool thing about working out with professional athletes, is that I have been letting go of some of the negative self-talk I've often done. The pros work out for two to three hours at a time. They have a morning workout and an afternoon workout. Then they often do some kind of other physical activity in the evening.

It teaches me that if I want to have a muscular athletic body, I have to put in the time. If I'm not willing to put in the time, there's no use whining about not having the body. One begets the other.

Also, on the thought of "working out," I am pleased to say that we have a contract on a house in Lake Charles, and I have a place to teach Jazzercise as of today. So a lot of things that have been up in the air are now solid. I am SO pleased.

Summertime Pictures

2010-07-04T11:18:00.002-05:00

A turned six in May. I asked him what kind of treat he wanted to bring to his class, and he chose chocolate chip cookies. So we made them together.

Went to the Houston Museum of Natural Histroy. Among the cool things we saw and did, I think's J's favorite was getting eaten by a dinosaur.

Pool time. The game is "splash as much as you can!" (I know my boys look alike. This is R.)

What is summertime without getting ice cream all over your face? Especially if you are four. (E).

And, of course, no summer is done without MY birthday! T supervised the boys making a cake for me. Yum!

Oops. Forgot I had a blog.

2010-06-30T10:11:00.002-05:00

It just occured to me, that unless you are on Facebook with me, you have no idea what's going on in my life. I have become a Facebook addict. It's just so much fun to hear little snippets about what people are doing, day to day. I have been posting one or two sentences about my days. (If you are on, and want to connect, click here).

So, if you are only reading my blog, you don't know...

1) I finally had surgery on my foot. It turns out that the pain I was experiencing was due to a calcified growth on on my fascia, rather than just an inflammation. It took a long time to figure it out, but it's done now. I'm using what they call a "walking boot" to protect my foot while the stitches heal. I am looking forward to going back to full activity in a few more weeks.

2) "Looking forward to..." is a HUGE understatement. I CANNOT WAIT to be able to jump and dance and go on long walks again. Yesterday would not be too soon!

3) We are preparing to move to Lake Charles, Louisiana. We lived there from 1998 to 2004. J & R were born there; A was conceived there. Suffice to say we have some history there, and I am really looking forward to being settled again. There are a number of communities I can be a part of, and that makes me happy. Also, some of the schools have French language immersion, and I am exploring whether that is a good option for the kids. I hope so.

4) I am now the mother of a 12 year old. And I haven't seen him since he was still 11. I sent the older boys to Colorado to see their grandparents and go to summer camp. They left June 5, and don't come home for another week. I miss them a lot. (Though the house is quieter & less chaotic).

5) I am working on my book on organizing again, and exploring what it means to be have a professional life again. I have put up a Facebook page just dedicated to bringing my professional self out of hibernation. (Click here, then click the "Like" button at the top of the page).

6) I am also doing my best to explore the world of social media. I learned at my industry conference that email is going the way of the fax machine, as people are connecting directly via text & messaging services (like Facebook). I've got a lot to learn, but it's keeping me busy.

Well, I think that's the general update for now. I'll try to remember to post more often.

Also, today my best friend's father is in the hospital. Even though I hear he is doing okay, adding extra prayer never hurts. If you've got some to spare...

It's official.

2010-06-21T14:22:00.002-05:00

T's job is in Lake Charles, Louisiana. We'll go house-hunting the weekend after next, and will move as soon as we find a place.

I am not 100% enamoured with the move - but we could do worse. I will be happy to have a home & a community.

Already I have reviewed & confirmed there is Jazzercise, a Yoga Center, and at least two people I remember from living there previously.

Happy Father's Day

2010-06-20T05:44:00.002-05:00

Hi Dad,

While it is not unusual for me to forget to send a card, and as far as I can remember, I have never purchased a tie for you, I DO want to make note of the occasion of Father's Day.

Whether "hands-on" parenting was part of your repitoire when I was growing up or not, I definitely remember you BEING there for me. I am lousy at remembering any particular moment of my childhood where you were actively involved, but there has never been a moment where you weren't around either. What I remeber most is that you were (and are) PRESENT in my life.

I remember at M&Y, when the video of Bucky played & he spoke of "loving comprehensibly," totally understanding what he meant. Always in my life I have comprehended your love. Always I have understood that WHO I AM is okay.

About ten years ago, when I studied with a metaphysical teacher, I remember having a vivid understanding of the gift you are to the world. The work that you and mom do is clearly your part of Tikkun Olam. I remember being awed by the generosity of your spirit.

Even though you present yourself as sardonic and irreverent, you get the bigger picture. Being one of the two people in the world who get to call you "dad" (every day) is one of my greatest joys.

I love you. Happy Father's Day. (and no, I didn't get it together to send you a card)

P.S. Enjoy the GAME.

Praying...

2010-06-17T01:41:00.002-05:00

For as long as I can remember, I have been taught that one should not pray for a particular outcome, but for "the highest good." The idea is that you could never know what god has in store for you (or others), and it is presumptuous to think otherwise.

But I have something in my life that I would really like to have turn out a particular way. All I can see are the reasons why it would be better to go my way. Why on earth god would want me to suffer longer, I have no idea.

Wow.

As I was thinking about writing this post, it was a rant about what I wanted. Now I see the words on the screen, it is reminding me that holding on to "what I want," is probably going to get in the way of actually getting it.

So let me start over...

God, I have this issue I want to resolve. I trust you already know how I am hoping things will turn out. But we've made it this far together, and I know you have my best interests at heart. I will do my best to trust that whatever the outcome is, it will be exactly what I need to grow as a human and to serve you.

I was just about to write. "whatever the outcome, I am sure it will be resolved soon." But then I realized that resolution is part of my wanting something. God may choose to leave it unfinished.

Arrgh.

Must remember to sit in stillness & trust. But I'm not finding it easy. Hmmm.

Is this the part where I ask others for support? Maybe you, too, can pray for my highest good. (FYI, this is not about where we will live, but about something else entirely). Thanks.

Still Waiting...

2010-06-12T18:50:00.003-05:00

Boy, after that last post, you'd think I had something exciting to tell you. Alas, it is not to be. We are STILL WAITING. It is somewhat like purgatory... You know you aren't going back where you were before, and you don't know where you're going next, and you can do NOTHING to change anything.

I can (as in T is finally sure enough to allow me to post) say that we will definitely be in one of two places - either here (Houston, Texas, but West instead of South), or there (Lake Charles, Louisiana). We'll know by the end of next week. Or the next.

The plusses for Houston: 1) the job T will have will be new & different & challenging; 2) my professional association has a chapter here; 3) if I decided to work again this is a bigger pond to fish in; 4) the area we are considering is closer in to town & thus closer to lots of stuff; 5) lots of opportunity to Jazzercise; 6) I could continue going to the gym I like; 7) there are two congregations nearby.

The plusses for Lake Charles: 1) we lived there for 6 years & are familiar with it; 2) lots of forest and open space for boys to explore; 3) the yoga center I used to go to still exists; 4) there is Jazzercise there too; 5) I could rejoin the Newcomers club, 6) we could get a lot more house for our money.

The minuses are pretty much opposite of whatever I wrote on the plus side.

But the biggest plus for either of them... I WOULD KNOW WHERE I AM GOING TO LIVE AND COULD GET ON WITH MY LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (not that I feel strongly about it).

I'd tell you; but then I'd have to kill you

2010-05-26T22:55:00.001-05:00

We know where we are probably going. But it's not a done deal yet. I can tell you where we aren't going though...

We are not going to Korea. (Although for about three weeks we were pretty sure of it). We are not returning to France. (And even if we did, so many of my friends have left, it wouldn't be the same anyway). We are not going to Saudi Arabia (Although that's where the project is being built - without ConocoPhillips).

We are not leaving the United States. My life as an expat is apparently over. At least for now.

We should know for certain by mid-June.

The good news is that we will probably be able to be there before school starts, so the boys (at least) will have a tad less chaos than last year.

End of School Count Down

2010-05-23T14:37:00.004-05:00

The birthday craziness is more or less over with now. All that is left is
1) Crazy Hair Day,
2) Dress in your favorite costume day,
3) Art Show & Performance,
4) Dress up day,
5) Kindergarten Graduation,
6) Third Grade Graduation, and
7) Splash Day.
And that's just for the younger three. (Pajama Day was last week).

Fortunately for the Middle School, J doesn't tell me anything, so I am not required to do anything to help him prepare.

I don't think it's just my imagination to think "this is WAY overdone!" (Mom, comment if I'm wrong). But I don't remember anything other than running out of school with glee on the last day. But not running too fast because we were loaded down with the crap we had to take home.

It's not that I don't want the kids to have fun... It's just that I don't want to be required to procure it.

Also, since when did we celebrate Kindergarten graduation? And Third Grade? (Granted, it is a montessori school, where 1st, 2nd and 3rd graders are in one room, and lots of 3rd graders do leave at the end... but still!)

The real problem is that I will have kids at home for a week or two before summer programs start. Gonna have to find babysitters so I can go to the gym!

(Bah Humbug!)

Birthdays & Parties & Birthday Parties

2010-05-16T16:49:00.002-05:00

It's that time of year again. When the parade of birthdays start. A's is May 23. All of the kids who have birthdays in the summertime are now required(!?) to celebrate at school before the end of the school year. Which apparently leads them to having parties at home/elsewhere also.

This weekend R went to a Pizza & Play party at a place called Incredible Pizza (I like to call it Inedible Pizza), but there are a zillion games to be played for "just a swipe of your (pre-paid) playing card!" But before they started playing, the kids got to break a pinata with lots of candy. Kids love it; moms, not so much.

Then today we had a double-birthday with two of the kids in A & E's class. At least this one was at a home. Just a lot of running around and a lot of cake. Oh, and more candy.

My "planning" for A's party means asking him which kids he plays with at school, hurriedly making a word doc. invitation, and handing it out to other parents at today's party.

J's birthday is in June, and he will be at his grandparent's house in Colorado. On one hand, that relieves me of planning duty. On the other hand, he has friends here, and maybe could have them over one afternoon before school gets out. But that's only two and a half weeks away. So, when?

And it just now occured to me... The week after J's birthday is my birthday. Can't think of anything I want right now other than to know where we'll be at the beginning of the next school year. Or something pretty...

Same Story, Different Day

2010-05-10T13:54:00.003-05:00

What I haven't written about is how every day T comes home with a new piece of information. Nothing is solid. No offers have been made. He's been interviewed/courted for other jobs, but nothing so clear as an actual job. So, in addition to the waiting, there is continuous speculation.

It's not as much fun as it sounds like.

I am exploring the possibility of going "back" to work. I put "back" in quotations, because I do NOT wish to work as a professional organizer any more. I may want to stay in the industry in some way, but it will not be as a practitioner.

There is a possibility I may get a "job," but I have no idea what it would look like. It is strange to even conceive of it after such a long time away from working. The last thing I did before I started my own business (in 1994!), was to work as the personal assistant to this woman. I've never really had a "job." Don't even know for sure how they work.

All of this is in the contemplation stage only. Until we know more. Until we know where the ground is. Any ideas?

Working on the "Zen" Part

2010-04-30T20:39:00.002-05:00

Right now, life feels more chaotic than usual. With T's project being cancelled, what we thought we were going to do (move to Korea), is not going to happen. And we don't know yet what will happen.

Not knowing in January where we'd be by August was very different than not knowing in May. I'm trying to remember to breathe and trust.

While in this "holding pattern," I am doing my best to help myself get healthy. I am doing good things for my body - physical therapy for plantar fasciitis, riding my new bike, weight lifting, etc. Jazzercise continues to challenge me both as a student and instructor.

At my conference for NAPO (see last post), I learned a lot about social media. I am working on getting my professional face into the world again. But first, I am trying to remember what it looks like.

Breathing. That's the most important part.

Comfort & Belonging

2010-04-22T07:07:00.002-05:00

And, while yesterday's news has really shaken me up, I am in a good place for that to happen - a place where uncertainty is just fine.

I am currently in Columbus, Ohio for the annual conference for the National Association of Professional Organizers (NAPO). I have been a member since 1997, and in the profession since 1994.

Even though I haven't worked as an organizer in more than four(!) years, I have never let go of being an organizer. I may not have clients, or be active in my association, but I still belong here.

And being here has been wonderful so far. I am reconnecting with old friends. I am being recognized and thanked for past participation (I helped build some of the core education curriculum here; and used to teach here). I am getting HUGS. Lots of them!

Still don't know whether/how I will resume working. But I am in the right place, right now.

It makes not knowing where I will be tomorrow a little easier to digest.

Big News

2010-04-21T13:07:00.003-05:00

HOUSTON, April 21, 2010 --- ConocoPhillips [NYSE:COP] has informed the Saudi Arabian Oil Company (Saudi Aramco) it will end participation in the new refinery project being built in Yanbu Industrial City.

“The quality of Saudi Aramco as a partner and significantly reduced capital costs from the recent re-bidding process made it a very difficult decision for us,” said Willie Chiang, senior vice president, Refining, Marketing and Transportation, ConocoPhillips. “We ultimately decided this project was not consistent with our current strategy to reduce our downstream footprint. We value and look forward to continuing our relationship with Saudi Aramco.”

This rocks my world. It means we are NOT going where we thought we were going. Back to not-knowing. Breathe.

Singing for Dollars

2010-04-05T12:48:00.002-05:00

The fact that J has bought himself a cell phone has given me insight to him, that I am sure he does not mean to show me...

The other day, we sent him and his brothers out into the neighborhood ("go outside - you're driving us crazy!") After a while, we called to check in to find out what they were doing & call them home for dinner.

"What's that noise?"

"R & A & E singing."

"Oh."

"To the neighbors."

"Really?"

"Yeah, they've made $6 so far."

"Really?"

Hmmmm.

My kids wandered the neighborhood, caroling & asking for donations. I have no idea who's idea it was. I sort of asked (without really wanting to know the answer), what it was they were singing?

"Twinkle Twinkle Little Star."
"Kill Barney."
"Jingle Bombs."

Good thing we're moving soon.

March in Photos

2010-04-03T10:11:00.012-05:00

Lots of things happened in March. I have tried to put them in date-order, but I could be wrong. Here's all the news I can manage...

Somewhere around the beginning of March, A lost his first tooth. J lost his first one just before he turned 6. R didn't lose his first until after he was 6. A's birthday isn't until the end of May. He therefore holds the record of youngest tooth-loser.

We spent the kids' spring break in Vail, Colorado. (There is no one from our family in this picture - I just wanted a photo of the mountain). All four kids did ski school. T boarded; I skied. The first few days were slushy & springlike. The last day it snowed a heavy, wet snow that made it very hard to ski in. Hard work. But F.U.N.!

While the skiing was wonderful, I don't think it is what J will be remembering about this particular vacation. What he will remember is finding a $100 bill in the street one afternoon. It burnt a hole in his pocket until he was able to spend it on his very own (pay-as-you-go) cell phone. Lord help me, I live with an adolescent...

... a very creative adolescent. In the airplane on the way home, J made elaborate planes for his younger brothers out of a stack of Post-It notes. I asked him where he learned to do it and he said, "I just made it up." The younger boys were totally enthralled.

Last weekend, we wandered down to George Ranch Historical Park, a place where Texas history "comes alive." Here is A "roping" a "cow." (See below for full picture of "calf.") We had a pretty good day wandering around and seeing homes from the 1830s; the 1890s; and 1910.

Here is E "riding" the "cow." Ride 'em cowpoke!

This was also at George Ranch. Mostly, I just like the picture of J kissing the pig.

My brother and his daughter came out for a visit. The boys LOVE him. Somehow he has become "Uncle Monkey Face." Not sure why, but he wears it well. That's actually my niece on his left leg. They do not live together, so it was nice for them to see each other as well as visit us.

Monday night was the first night of Passover. We had a kid-friendly seder. I do not have an "official" seder plate, but discovered my serving dish from Tunisia worked beautifully. I think I may just decide that it is our official seder plate. (Though I'll probably use it for other things too). Isn't it pretty?

My brother requested that we go to the beach "since you're so close." I hadn't been to Galveston for a long time, so we piled into the car and drove down. One of the cool things we saw were a whole bunch of jelly fish washed up on the shore. These were about the size of a large dinner plate. And there were gobs of them. Yes, I poked them with a stick. (They didn't do anything).

On the way to school on Tuesday, we saw this little fella wandering down the road. The boys were very excited. I kind of was too - because usually we see them flattened. It was nice to see one alive and well.

And since we are on the subject of wild things in Texas, I thought I'd share our latest family photo. Personally, I couldn't be prouder that my four-year-old son knows how to make "zombie-eyes."

Miscellaneous

2010-03-17T17:59:00.004-05:00

I still don't know for sure where we'll be living in six months (or even four...), but right now I am at the base of Vail Mountain. The skiing has been slushy; the sun shining and the company lovely. It's supposed to snow tomorrow, but I have cold-weather gear, so it's fine with me.

Something that has very little to do with anything else, but I'm sharing anyway... This website http://walkingthroughthewalls.blogspot.com/ is the beginning of a story of a dear friend and mentor of mine. While you won't know it by reading the first four chapters (which is all that's posted so far), Ken Windes grew to become one of the most loving, funny, outrageous, divine, amazing teachers I've ever had in my life. This is his life story. Let me know if you decide to read it.

A friend sent me this photo. How to store & organize cats:

Better random posting than none at all. Happy St. Patricks Day.

Living in Limbo-Land

2010-03-05T19:50:00.003-06:00

It is March 5 and I still don't know where I will be living in August. I knew I wouldn't know. But that doesn't make it any easier. I have a number of things I have paid for through the end of May - pool maintenance, Karate classes, personal trainer, membership dues at the temple. Once school is out, all bets are off.

We will be paying rent on this house through July. But will we be living in it? Will we be on our way somewhere? Will we be living in a hotel?

The mystery lives on.

How I know adolescence has entered our home:

2010-02-21T09:42:00.003-06:00

"DO NOT ENTER OR YOU WILL END UP LIKE THE CHICKEN"

"SQUAAAAAAK!!"

Pictures of BIG Texas Stuff

2010-02-20T18:02:00.004-06:00

I keep thinking I will sit down and write a post. But whenever I've been in here (my office) for the past week, there has just bee so much stuff sitting around that I get too distracted. Even though there is still all the stuff, at least it's divided & stacked neatly so I can find things. (Yes, I am anal that way).

Anyway, here are a few things that I am enjoying about living here...

Amazing sunsets in wide-open spaces.

Huge bath tub. Not only is it big, it has jets. The bubbles got so big, they fell over the side. (This picture was taken at the end of the bath!) Total luxury.

Actually, I'm not sure how much I like this. My friend is envious of me having large places to shop and easily maneuverable carts. I'm still a little overwhelmed by the huge-ness of an H.E.B. Grocery. And underwhelmed by the taste of the produce. (It looks beautiful, but it doesn't taste that great).

R & J playing with the build-it stuff at the Houston Space Center. They liked the toys. I liked the real(!) NASA space-going vessels. Amazing that humans really have gone into space in what amounts to a really fancey tin can.

Toto, We're not in Paris Anymore

2010-01-27T21:31:00.003-06:00

I went to lunch today with T, downtown Houston. There is apparently a city under the city, with tunnels & walkways & plazas covering about 40 blocks (plus or minus). I never knew. But you can walk for miles without ever going out into the open air.

Which I guess is good on rainy days, but it got a little weird after awhile. But that's not actually why I wrote the title.

The real reason why, is that when we went into the restaurant, the first thing the waiter says to us is "I'd bring you bread, but we're all out... Can I get you something to drink?"

To which I answered, "absolutely. Bring me a Riesling or a Pinot Grigio."

He then informs me that they don't serve alcohol.

Okay, fine. I can live without wine at lunchtime. (It's a struggle, but I'm strong).

But here's the kicker. At the end of the meal, when we declined desert, he informed us that the espresso machine was broken. So sorry.

So, in summary. Underground restaurant. No bread. No wine. No espresso.

I am in withdrawl.

What's Old is New Again

2010-01-20T13:44:00.002-06:00

I think I've finally figured out why this place feels so odd to me. When we left Sugar Land, I was very comfortable here. Even though we were on our way to exciting, exotic Paris, I did not necessarily want to leave. I had friends, professional relationships, Jazzercise, schools, babysitters, et cetera.

When it was time to leave, in order to make it easier to go, I started noticing all the things I didn't like about living here - all the things that didn't work. I understand it is a normal thing to do, to distance oneself from what you will lose.

So, when we left, it was with the understanding we would never live here again. I said my goodbyes, focused on the negatives and (more or less) didn't look back. (I was, after all, moving to Paris!)

Now, the things that are the most obvious are those I put down on my way out. They haven't changed, just my way of looking at them. It's been more work than I expected to find my place here again.

On the bright side, our air shipment just arrived a few minutes ago. I'm off to unpack and try to make it feel more like home.

Deja vu all over again

2010-01-16T19:40:00.002-06:00

I seem to recall writing a post about how it sucked to live long-term in a hotel. I am feeling that way again. I have been living out of a suitcase since December 27.

We have our house. It is ready to go. We just haven't had any stuff. Our air shipment has arrived in Houston, but apparently didn't make it through customs. Monday is a federal holiday, so there will be no one to process it until Tuesday.

We've decided that we can't stand it any more. We bought air mattresses for boys (and happened to be due for a new mattress set ourselves, so went ahead and bought it). Today I bought sheets & blankets and a set of kitchen utensils. Last week we bought towels & groceries.

The upshot is we are moving into the house tomorrow. Hooray! I'm tired of being a nomad.

*********************

In other news, it's been strange to be back in Sugar Land, Texas again. There are a number of places and people I said goodbye to, never intending to return. It's only been 18 months, so it feels very surreal to be saying hello again.

I am delighted to be able to go to Jazzercise classes again. This is where I made the commitment to become an instructor, and these are the people who had supported me on this journey. Sadly, there has been a tragic loss in this community recently and re-entry has been disjointed.

Hopefully be being in our home, and teaching Jazzercise again, I will be able to feel settled for awhile.

Reverse Culture Shock

2010-01-08T21:49:00.002-06:00

There are two things about being back here that are especially weird for me right now.

The first is how BIG everything seems. Not seems. Is. I keep going in to buildings and feeling completely overwhelmed. Just the grocery store goes on forever. It feels like I have to walk for miles.

I went to a furniture store yesterday and there were two chairs I was interested in - on opposite sides of the store. I had to keep going back and forth. The distance was equivalent to going to the end of my street and back. Repeatedly.

The second thing that is taking some getting used to is all of the "in-your-face" advertising and consumerism. There is nothing you can't get here. And preferably RIGHT NOW.

I realize there was advertising in France too - but not being able to understand it; or using it as a French language lesson made it a lot more palatable.

Here it is all-advertising, all-the-time. It is easy to see why the world views Americans as such rampant consumers. We are.

(Lest anyone get upset... I am not complaining - merely observing. I can't say I am upset about being able to get what I want when I want it without difficulty... I'm just noticing how easy it is).

What I like about being in the USA...

2010-01-03T22:18:00.002-06:00

When I went to get a coffee, I was able to joke with the barista, and have a conversation with the person in line behind me.

Doesn't matter what the conversation was about. Just remembered that I like to talk to strangers.

Not being able to (talk to strangers) was probably the single biggest culture shock for me in France. I remember my first week there, I tried telling the baker how much I liked the package she had wrapped up for me. I tried to say something like "tres jolie," but apparently got it wrong, because it took about ten more minutes to pantomime that everything was okay, and I wasn't complaining, and yes I wanted what I had purchased.

It is nice to understand what is going on around me here.

On the negative side though, now I'm getting all kinds of "news" wherever I go. And news here is (almost) always sensationalized & bad.

But I like being able to understand.

Update: We have arrived in Houston. School starts on Tuesday. Once I get everyone to their proper locations, I am taking the day OFF!!!

Happy New Year!

2010-01-01T22:33:00.002-06:00

Every January 1, I try to think about what I want the upcoming year to be about. Sometimes I write goals. Sometimes I write "intentions." Sometimes I look at all the areas in my life and think about each one individually.

Today, I woke up in time to watch the sun rise and thought about what I wanted, given the chaos and uncertainty that I know is coming. I've decided that what would give me the most peace this year is Acceptance.

Acceptance of how things are.
Acceptance of what is.
Acceptance of this moment.
Without judging it as bad or wrong.
Without trying to change it.
Without trying to plan it.

Wishing you a 2010 filled with light, love & joy.

Repatriation is not pretty

2009-12-29T10:42:00.003-06:00

I have read about reverse culture shock in my books about how to be an expatriate. I understand about grieving the place you've lost, and about wanting things to be the same. Unfortunately though, knowing what is happening doesn't make it any less painful. On the other hand, I am able to kind of observe myself with compassion and see a bigger picture. Here are some of my observations from my first day out and about (yesterday):

1. There is so much space here. I was driving at one point, and looked out the window. The suburban street I was on, appeard to be wider than the largest highway in France.

2. 40 mph is a LOT faster than 40 kph. I kept discovering myself driving under the speed limit, just because I wasn't used to going so fast.

3. Christmas/Holiday light displays are fun. They seem to get brighter and cheerier every time I see them. We went out to a special garden tour where they had amazing light sculptures.

4. It was great to be able to read all the signs, ask for information on where to park, and hear the instructions and not have to be "pretty sure" I understood. I did understand.

5. Having someone else be responsible for getting all the routines right (in a Jazzercise class) was great fun. All I had to do was follow along. High altitude whooped my behind though! Actually doing new routines with someone else leading was awesome.

6. No matter how many times I look out the window, I am not going to see the church steeple or my neighbors' trees.

7. There are no boulangeries nearby and the bread sucks.

Other than that, I'm doing okay.

Still cold. But on the other side of the World.

2009-12-28T08:05:00.003-06:00

We arrived in Colorado yesterday evening after a long travel day. Would-be terrorists serve to demonstrate how easy it is to make the US government panic. Added security precatuions had us going through three security checkpoints (one immediately prior to boarding), plus unable to get up out of our seats (at all) for the last hour of travel. (Of course you know when children need to go potty, don't you? Even though we brought everyone at the last minute).

Other than that, it was relatively uneventful. The lovely flight crew on British Airways took good care of us. (Helped that the plane was half empty). The children had a screen-fest - eight hours of movies & television. I watched Julie & Julia and a couple of sit-coms too. It's been awhile since I've watched anything like that.

American television. I never watched that much when I lived here. But since I haven't been ABLE to watch in France, it is more appealing now.

On the drive home, as I looked out the window, I got depressed. Strip malls and highways are certainly not the thing to make me excited about living here again. I told my mom I need to visit someplace beautiful to remember what I like about here.

Fortunately in Colorado, that's not too hard. I will go for a walk on the Highline Canal this afternoon. (But I need snow boots first).

All for now.

Random Thoughts

2009-12-21T13:01:00.002-06:00

It is c.o.l.d. here. It is snowing again. Yesterday we didn't leave the house. T made a fire and we hung out in the living room all day long. Watched the movie UP. (Cute). Today I made everyone get out, including myself.

Went and bought boxes so I could pre-pack some things (mostly stuff that the moving companies don't like, but I don't want to part with). Also, just needed to do something toward getting ready to leave.

Looks like we are going to leave on the 27th instead of the 30th. The idea of having a mini-vacation in Brussels just started sounding like too much work. I couldn't get a handle on packing for a trip amidst packing to leave. So we will spend an extra few days in Colorado with my parents and brother.

Still need to do things like arrange electric, gas, water, internet, etc. for the new place. And arrange for the kids to go back to Torah study.

Thinking about how/when/if to push for J's B'nei mitsvah. We were going to start him on the studies next school year. But now I don't know where we will be.

It's going to be an interesting year.

Important things to know/remember

2009-12-02T13:43:00.002-06:00

Not everyone will understand this post. But for those of you who do...

1. A has brought BunBun back to bed again. It's like an old friend is home.
2. Both A & E know what a frumious bandersnatch is. And can recite Jabberwocky along with me.
3. J just saved up enough money to purchase a scooter for himself.
4. R has (another) mohawk.

All I can think of for now... but I didn't want to forget.

How am I doing?

2009-12-01T07:30:00.003-06:00

I have a lot of tears today. I am feeling very sad about not seeing the amazing friends I have here anymore. We had our book club this morning, and it was wonderful. But when the talk turned to what's happening next month & the month after, it really hit me. I'm not coming back.

These dear, dear women whose friendships I treasure, will continue on without me. While, "you can always skype!" may be true, it's not going to work out when the gathering here is at 10:30 in the morning (3:30 a.m. Houston time). I just have to say goodbye.

And I don't want to. I don't want to leave. It took my so long to find my bearings here. I've found them now. I know what to do, how to do it and whom to invite. But knowing how to live here is no longer a necessary part of my life.

The good news is that I'm going back to some place that is easy and comfortable. But, even that is temporary. There will be a new place to go, new habits to learn, and new friends to make once T gets the new assignment.

And, as I keep explaining to him, being sad is just part of the process. It doesn't mean I'm not going to go. It doesn't mean I'm mad at him. It's not the end of the world. It's just how I'm feeling today.

Paris through my son's eyes

2009-11-29T15:17:00.005-06:00

I've had a visitor all this week. Two actually. My niece (who is my age) and her father - my husband's brother. N had a list of the "Top 10 places to visit in Paris." As I still hadn't seen some of them and/or I wanted to be a good hostess, I went with her.

So, in the past week, I have been to:

1) The Musee d'Orsay
2) The Arche du Triomphe
3) Walking on the Champs Elysee
4) Chateau Versailles
5) Patisserie Laudree (supposedly the best macaroons in the world)

I actually went to the Arch with my oldest son (who had a doctor's appointment that morning just down the street). He has been experimenting with his camera, but left it home that day. I let him use mine. And what a treat it was to see through his eyes.

The walkway under the surrounding roads (where 12 roads come together in a roundabout).

Looking up at the arch from underneath.

Looking down the spiral staircase from inside one of the pillars.

Near the top there was a room that was inaccessible, but we could see. He liked how the window looked.

Looking out from the top. (That is the Sacre Coeur).

People have been asking me...

2009-11-19T02:45:00.002-06:00

Will you miss it?
Are you ready?
You must be really busy preparing to leave.
What do you need help with?

And what I've been doing this morning is lying on the couch, looking out the window, thinking about the answers (in no particular order).

I'm going to miss the georgeous red berries in my neighbor's yard. I am going to miss the houses around here that are built with multi-shaded, multi-shaped stones cemented together in no apparent pattern, but with great appreciation for the texture of the rock. I am going to miss seeing the Eiffel Tower whenever I go into town. I am going to miss the incredibly fresh food I get from market every Wednesday and Saturday.

I have made such wonderful friends here, in the expat community, in the moms-married-to-French-men community & in the French community where my children go to school and to temple. I am going to miss them all. I trust that some friendships will fall away with time. But others will get richer & deeper, no matter where we may live. I've learned from this experience that the world is indeed, a very small place. I can, and will, get around.

Right now, my preparations to leave involve thinking about where I haven't yet been. What will I regret missing if I don't do. The list is fortunately, not unattainable. But there are things I've had to take off the list. Things I would have done if I'd had more time. Gien. Normandy. Nice. Loire Valley. The things I'm going to do/see over the next six weeks: Get a portrait done at Monmartre. Visit the Opera house. Take the Paris Fashion Tour. Get a guided tour at the Louvre (don't just wander around on my own). Walk in the forest. See the chateau at Versailles.

Things I'll try to do differently next time: 1) Dont' worry so much about feeding the kids. Trust that if they're hungry, they'll eat. Praise god they like fruits & a number of vegetables and we'll work out the rest. 2) Visit places sooner. Remain a tourist longer. Don't trust that there will be a "next year" to get there. Go now. You'll make friends along the way. 3) Arrange babysitters sooner. And use them more. Spend time with each child individually and with T.

What do I need help with? I'm working on my lists and I'm sure there will be a number of things. The most important one is to remember that it's ALL temporary. I do not need to stress about what I cannot change. Remind me to keep laughing & keep loving & appreciate what's in front of me (not just Paris, but family & friendships). I'll keep you posted. :)

What's next

2009-11-14T12:26:00.003-06:00

Maybe you'll be interested to know where we're going from here. We've decided to leave France sooner rather than later. We'll spend a few days on holiday in Germany (doing the whole train-ride thing so everyone gets the opportunity to run around while travelling), then I will fly home (to Colorado) with all the boys for a short visit with grandma & grandpa.

From there, we will return to Sugarland, Texas (Houston area) for six to eight months. The company wants to put us up in a 3-bedroom apartment for that time. We've told them this is unacceptable. Our plan is to rent a house in/near the neighborhood we lived before, so the boys (and I) will not have to re-learn everything all over again. (T will join us after packing up the house here).

Afterwards (sometime in the spring or summer), we'll find out where we're moving next. T will work on the next project in the office of the contractor with the winning bid. We don't know where that will be; but it is unlikely to be in the USA.

I am looking forward to living in a place I am comfortable. I will miss here a LOT. But it's been a good adventure, and I no longer have the fear of the unknown I had earlier. I have lived through an expatriation in France. If I can do it here, I can do it anywhere.

Pictures - Tunisia

2009-11-13T13:29:00.004-06:00

Cool pottery - each piece comes out. Yes, I own one.

The meat market. What you can't see is the cow in the donkey's wagon.

Making things is cool.

E is riding his toy camel.

Top of the mountain. We really did ride a long time.

You must have a hajib to ride a camel. Apparently.

J&R.

Four different styles decorating this room in the (former) governor's palace.

Might as well jump.

The ruins at Carthage.

Pictures - London (+1 of R)

2009-11-13T13:21:00.006-06:00

Obligatory picture of the London Bridge.

Strawberry beer!

Nirvana is a restaurant in London. It was closed.

Slept here.

8-year old with home-made dragon

I am NOT going to apologize.

2009-11-13T12:16:00.004-06:00

I haven't written. I've done lots of blog-worthy things. But I haven't told you about any of it. And now, there is too much new stuff going on to go back & report on all the past. But I'll try to give a short recap:

September: Way too busy, doing things for the Parent-Faculty Association of the school AND starting to teach Jazzercise again. Loved one; wished I hadn't done the other. I'll leave it up to you to figure out which is which.

Early October: Took a much needed, much deserved vacation with my husband, sans children. We went to London and had a wonderful time. Stayed in a church-turned-bed&breakfast. Exceedingly cool.

Late October: Took the kids on an all-inclusive vacation to the beaches of Tunisia. This time I was sans husband. I traveled with another mom. Between us there were seven kids. Or six kids plus one teenager. I found something there I hadn't realized I'd lost (the ability to cut loose on the dance floor - wahoo!) This trip included camel-riding, a visit to Carthage & a Tunisian pottery market.

November: T's project has been cancelled. Instead of staying in France for three years, we'll leave after 18 months. Which means January. Or possibly December. We're scrambling to make arrangements & plans. Maybe I'll start posting again. I'll put up pictures in a separate post. Probably.

Two New is Too Much

2009-09-17T04:25:00.002-05:00

T pointed out to me last night that I have started two VERY BIG projects at the same time - one being Jazzercise & the other being the Volunteer Coordinator at J & R's school. I have been overwhelmed, upset, stressed out and crazy.

Beleive it or not, starting two big things at once is MORE STRESSFUL than dividing up two households to seven different locations/categories.

It's almost over (at least the newness of it all). When it is, I'll write more.

Getting Back into Shape

2009-09-05T03:24:00.002-05:00

It's Saturday morning. T & J are working on replacing the downstairs television. R has a friend visiting. A & E are circling around somewhere. I have committed to lifting weights some time this morning, but haven't determined when.

I don't really want to. But I would like to have more muscle definition, and that doesn't come without work.

I have finally, after all summer off, managed to heal my knee and my foot. I am, thankfully, feeling strong enough to teach Jazzercise again, and confident that I won't re-injure myself. I am so incredibly grateful for my good health.

This is something I do not wish to take for granted. I notice how strong the mind-body connection is when I have to STOP doing the physical things that make up who I am. I have had to re-define myself over the summer (again & again). I am looking forward to dancing again. And feeling strong.

If you're here in Paris, maybe you'll join me. We dance; we sweat; we laugh. And we feel GOOD!

Can I get an "Amen!"?

2009-09-01T12:50:00.003-05:00

School starts tomorrow for little boys. (Started last week for olders). Need I say more? Bonne Rentrée!

Of Boys & Beasts

2009-08-28T15:13:00.005-05:00

Random photos from August...

We spent one day in Colorado Springs with T's family. His sister lives there with her two daughters & five grandkids. His brother came visiting from Massachusettes with his daughter. Among excellent barbeque & down home cooking at Cracker Barrel, we visited Garden of the Gods in Colorado Springs, truly one of the (many) stunning places in Colorado.

R & A with one of the (second-)cousins. I am "aunt" to her mother, who is a few years older than me. I am delighted that my children will have memories of rock "scrambling," climbing around on Colorado rocks.

J, who has again found the highest point possible.

On the first or second day we were home, while we waited for dinner, the boys re-discovered American television. What I think is funny, is the one thing they had to see was Scooby Doo. We have about 8 Scooby Doo DVDS here.

"I want to be a pirate, mommy." Now all I have to do is teach him to say "Arrrgh" by September 19. (Look it up).

Of course, if we're taking pictures of one boy, the other has to get in on the action. Mostly he was making faces, but I caught him just being happy.

E having his first x-ray at the Dentist. I love this dentist. They can do all four boys at once, and each seat has a flat-screen television on the ceiling, and headphones to listen. Doubt if I could find anything like that here. (This is in Denver).

Last week, we had returned, and were working on getting over jetlag. I'd heard about this "zoo," and thought we'd check it out. It's not a zoo, actually. It's an "animal park." You drive in, and the animals are just outside your window. No fences, just wandering around. The zebras, especially would come right up to the car. This young one is nursing it's mother so close, I could have reached out of the car window and touched it.

The bears & buffalo are in a separate area from other animals. (Also, the big cats have a place of their own - but still no fences between animal & car). I, and all of the boys were VERY excited.

And the last wild beast of the post... One morning, when I woke R up he yawned, and I noticed his tongue was black. After a momentary panic, I consulted Dr. Google. Here is what I found.

Birthday Presents

2009-08-28T15:03:00.006-05:00

I never got around to writing about my fortieth birthday. It's about time, I think. But, since my writing muscles are starting to wither away, I'm going to cheat (again), and post pictures instead.

I bought myself a boquet of flowers in the morning (which is something I should do a lot more often, by the way). By the time my party was over, I had three boquets and one orchid. I had flowers on my desk; flowers in the kitchen; flowers in the hallway & flowers in my bedroom. One of my friends gave me a book of things to do "now that you're 40." I'm thinking that having flowers around is one of those things.

Here I am at the party. See my beautiful cake? See my beautiful cleavage? One fun thing about living in France is how easy/comfortable/appreciated it is to share your shape.

At the party we had fireworks, which J helped set off - so the kids had a good time too. Two days ago, I learned just how close we had been to having the fire department called on us.

Apparently someone in the apartment behind our house saw us shooting things off, and worried we'd set the house on fire. Her neighbor, who works at the boys' school looked out, recognized one of the guests at the party, and reassured her neighbor that "oh, that's just an American thing. They're harmless. It's okay. Do NOT call the fire department."

Makes me wonder about all the things I don't know about, which I discover later. Hmmm.

My present to myself, was a three-day vacation at a spa in the Alsace region of France. I took a fast train, arranged a taxi, and spent three days taking care of no one but myself. On one of my walks, I noticed this ladder. Being the curious soul that I am (and having no children around in which I wouldn't want to have followed me), I climbed.

At the top of the ladder was a single wooden seat (really, a platform with a back). I turned around, sat down and watched the world go by for awhile. The best thing about this trip was the opportunity to slow down. To let go and to listen to the parts of me that generally get drowned out in the noise of everyday living.

The town was having some kind of art installation about bugs. All around town, I found these lovely creatures, climbing up walls, on the sidewalk, in cafes. Fun & silly.

Last, but definitely not least, my best girlfriend made time to visit with me this summer. She left her three boys, to hang out with me and two of mine (the older boys were in Denver with their grandma). This wasn't officially a birthday visit, but it was such a gift I had to include it. Love you, gal!

Long Enough

2009-08-10T09:41:00.002-05:00

I believe I have been gone from France long enough to miss it. Or maybe I'm just ready for school to re-start again. I've been in Houston for a week now. I've enjoyed seeing my old friends, eating at familiar restaurants (when I'm hungry - not when they deign to feed me).

I've tried to see my former health care providers, but all except one are no longer practicing where I thought they were. Fortunately, their replacements have been happy to provide me with the prescriptions I need. (I think that's the main purpose of this trip - to get prescriptions refilled).

My best girlfriend came out for the weekend and we had a wonderful time catching up. And finally, T came out, so I'm no longer a single-mommy.

Nonetheless, I am ready to get back to my regularly-scheduled life - for the kids to have places to go, for the rhythms of life to relax, and to have my own space again.

We leave Houston tomorrow, will spend Wednesday in Colorado Springs with T's sister & brother & families. On Thursday I will fit in packing, last-minute shopping and a visit with both my aunt, and my niece.

Can I pile it on, or what? (Geez!)

I Planned; God Laughed

2009-08-02T19:29:00.003-05:00

So. All of you know what an excellent, outstanding organizer I am. And you all know I have four kids. Therefore, planning a trip overseas with different people leaving and arriving and staying in different places at different times shouldn't be a problem. Right?

(Oh, I kid... I'm good, yes - but this took a lot of juggling).

Basically, I arranged our sojourn to the United States around the idea of sending the older boys to summer camp (sleep-away camp). They had gone last year (while T & I were expatriating), and L.O.V.E.D(!) it. A little scheduling magic, and TA-DA, we can do it.

Except for one little snag...

Apparently it's been raining in Colorado. A lot. Way more than usual. Enough to cause flooding. (You see where this is heading, don't you?)

Their beloved camp was flooded in the days prior to our arrival. It caused mold to occur in the kitchen (unheard of in Colorado's usually dry climate), and caused the health department to close the camp.*

With some emergency phone calls, we found a camp that would take them. Except this camp had already started, and would have to absorb them mid-stream. They said it would be okay, as long as the boys stayed for the following session...

Whoops. If they stayed for the following session, they would miss the opportunity to see their cousin & great aunt. That doesn't work. So, oops again. Can't go there. How about a nice YMCA day camp?

While that did work out, I found myself preparing lunches and thinking to myself... so when does my vacation start?

After a few more back-and-forths, it was decided that while J would stay at G-ma & G-pa's house next week, and attend a few days of (day-)camp, R would go ahead to the alternate overnight camp. He is the one who was profoundly disappointed; and he is the one who makes friends easily. So, he goes.

This morning, my mom brought A, E & me to the airport to fly to Houston for nine days; and my dad brought R to his camp. When I checked in with my folks later in the day, they informed me that R's camp doesn't start until tomorrow, actually. Ah, well.

*We didn't find this out until after the two-hour drive to camp. The boys did however, get to say hello to their counselors, so I guess the trip was worth it.

Acceptance

2009-07-14T04:43:00.002-05:00

I've been at my spa for two days now - this is the third. I'm enjoying the quiet, and the lack of any schedule or demands on my time. I've had time to sit and stare into space and nap and think. (In addition to hanging out in the pool, sauna, steamroom & jacuzzi)...

Last week, my friend/mentor/counselor suggested I spend some time meditating on the concept of acceptance - especially when it has to do with accepting my body size/shape and not trying so hard to change myself.

I started with the question, when did I stop feeling good about my body? I let my mind wander, and ended up in junior high school in a particularly painful memory of showing up at school in a new outfit (for the record - a turquoise blue mini skirt/sweatshirt set), and being told that I looked fat.

I remember thinking to myself, "No. I'm not," but wondering anyway. There was something so important about fitting in, I had to consider they knew more than I did.

I don't remember much more of the scene, but I can still recall the names of the girls I desperately wanted to have like me. They never did, and I did find other friends. But the feeling remains to this day, of looking outside myself for acceptance.

From that memory, I went on to think about when do I feel good about my body? And I remembered many times on the dance floor of various bars, just dancing because it felt good to move. Dancing because I loved the music and I couldn't sit still. Dancing whether or not I had a partner. Feeling all the different ways I could move my body. Loving the attention of people watching me. And, at the same time, not caring at all what others thought because I was having such a good time.

And now it is today, 2009 and I'm 40. I am a Jazzercise instructor, and I get to invite other people to my party, to dance with me. It is a good place.

It becomes even more important to allow my knee to heal completely, so I can go back to dancing. So I can remember it's not about my size or shape, but about the joy of having a body - the joy of moving it.

I'm noticing something as I write this post... I still haven't come to the place of acceptance of what IS. What if I couldn't dance? Would that mean I never get to that place of joy again? It appears I still have some work/meditation to consider...

I am the mother of an 11 year-old

2009-07-07T02:13:00.005-05:00

A lot has happened in the past few weeks, so I never got around to posting about J's birthday. I went a little overboard in letting him have both a "ropes course" in the woods and a sleep-over. But I don't regret it.

This is the first time in 11 years he's had more than two friends around for his birthday (as school gets out at the end of May in the US. Here, we only had to have the party one week early).

In honor of his 11th year, let me introduce my oldest boy...

Here he is with a boy from his class who came to the birthday party. Unfortunately there are very few decent pictures of the ropes course they climbed on, because the camera was acting up. Just imagine a lot of boys high up in trees (with proper safety gear).

He got the first part of the cake at his party. He got the second half with family on the actual day of his birthday.

We got him a swiss army knife to replace the one he'd lost. But the small, square packaging was so obvious, I decided to hide it within a larger box. Then I decided to make it more fun, by wrapping it again. So he got to unwrap three times before he got to the actual gift.

You can see here how much he loved it. (The other thing in his hand is a gift card to iTunes from his grandparents).

The boy has been stealing my paperclips to make lock picks. (He requested a set of professional lock picks for his birthday because "these aren't sturdy enough.") Like I need to support his kleptocratic habits. I finally confiscated them all when he started to teach the younger boys how to do it.

Where ever we go, he finds the highest thing around to climb on. (That's E behind him crying because he can't get up). We have a rule in our family - if you can't get there yourself, it's too high. J can apparently go anywhere.

When we went to Versailles to see the fountains, it was a beautiful warm day. The boys got quickly bored with history and art, and started messing around instead. J was so good that day, letting the littler boys climb all over him.

He managed to carry all of them at least once, and here got two at once. This was the most fun for me - watching him loving his brothers.

Where did the year go? How did he get so big? And capable.

Birthday Dinner

2009-07-04T02:05:00.003-05:00

I think this is the most expensive meal I have ever eaten. Good thing I only turn 40 once. And yes, it was exceptionally yummy! And the view was georgous.

The only not-perfect part was that there was never any aknowledgement of my birthday. The woman at the table next to us however, received a dessert with a candle. She looked confused. Maybe it was supposed to be mine.

It's a Fine Life*

2009-07-02T10:47:00.005-05:00

For your viewing pleasure - a field of rapseed, looking up.

It's official. I am 40 years old. Today. So far (other than a sore knee), forty feels pretty good.

I woke up early (not on purpose, but it worked out that way). I took myself for a brisk walk in the cool morning air. I returned in time to switch parenting duties with T, who left for work. Since the boys were still sleeping, I got out my journal and wrote a little.

I thought about something Jeremy Taylor says about how our dreams always come to us in the service of health and wholeness, and that our souls are always striving toward wholeness. It occured to me that this might be true for my body as well - it, too, is doing its best to heal. Maybe all I need to do is to get out of the way, and stop trying to push it so hard.

I am concerned that if my knee doesn't heal, teaching Jazzercise will be damaging to myself rather than good for me. Which, makes this really important. I'm getting support, and I'm attending to it. I think I'll be good for September.

After writing in my journal, the boys still weren't up, so I came in to check out my email and read my favorite inspiring blog. Within moments, I got a skype call from a good friend who had stayed up late (Colorado time) to wish me happy birthday. Then, after saying goodbye, I read a lovely letter from my mother, describing how my life was as a baby.

While I was reading, my brother (who is also in Colorado) skyped too, and I got to talk to him. By that time, the boys were up and got to say hello to their "Uncle Monkey Face" too.

What a nice way to start my 4th decade.

Tonight T is taking me out to a fancy dinner at La Maison Blanche, and next weekend I will take myself to a spa in Alsace. Life is good.

* It's a Fine Life

Random Pictures of R

2009-06-21T08:42:00.002-05:00

I have so many pictures from the last month, it's going to take me awhile to post them. I'm trying an experiment, writing about one kid at a time. This one is R. Eight & a half years old. Now, since he's no longer a 2nd grader, it's official. He's a third grader. Wow.

In this picture, he is at the "treehouse" he and his brother discovered in the forest nearby. They have been working together on "improvements." Except J complains that all R does is watch while he does all the work. As much is getting done, I'm not too worried about who's "job" it is.

On a trip to Versailles to look at the fountains, it was a beautiful day. There are lots of expanses of green grass where people picnicked and frolicked. Here, R is working on his cartwheel. Still could use some work.

The entire second grade (about 35 kids) went on an extended field trip to "Circus Camp." They all got to learn all the different things - trapeze, juggling, tight-"rope"-walking, ball-walking, hoops, clowning, etc. Then, they chose their
two favorites to perform for the parents. He chose ball-walking and clowning. They had great costumes and tremendous support from the staff.

Here he is telling his joke about "Burpee the Flea." He was the only kid to perform solo (she's holding the microphone for him). I'll post the video when T gets it out from the entire circus performance.

He was awesome! Her he is afterwards, with makeup still on. With me, his proud mama.

It's fun to be his mom. (Even though he often drives me crazy). So what else is new?

I'll try to make a post like this for each kid over the next week or two.

School's out

2009-06-18T09:08:00.004-05:00

Well, for the big guys, anyway. Today was the last day of school. Lots of people are leaving permanently, or moving on to other assignments.

It's interesting. I have made a home/community within the school and the expat population here. One thing that didn't occur to me as I did this, is... people leave. There's no getting around it. It is a constantly revolving door here.

So, today I had to say goodbye to new friends. I like the idea of keeping in touch. But I'm not sure how well it will work out. Hopefully this blog will be one of the ways in which I do it.

Which is, I guess why I started it in the first place. So, even if I don't post regularly, it's still more than I would be doing if I were trying to keep in touch by emailing or calling my friends.

I may or may not get around to posting last month's pictures. I'm not that great at doing the "backlog" stuff. But, as my writing coach pointed out, I need to remember the purpose of writing. Which, here, is to stay connected.

I'll be visiting the states soon - Colorado from July 25 - Aug 1, and Texas Aug 2 - 11. Let me know if we can get together.

Since the older boys are out of school now, most (but not all) of my school-related activities are done. I am looking forward to exploring a little of Paris with big kids. I'll (try to remember to) keep you posted. :)

Oh, Hi there...

2009-06-15T07:30:00.002-05:00

It's not that I haven't had anything to write about. It's not even that I've been so busy I don't have time to write. It's not that I don't care.

Come to think of it, I don't really know why I haven't posted in almost a month. Hmmm. Let's see if I can recap what's been happening in the past 30 days...

In order of what I remember...

1. Birthday party for J;
2. Birthday party for A;
3. Planning birthday party for me;
4. Day-trip to Chartres - the labyrinth was OPEN!
5. Tour through the Les Halles district of Paris;
6. Planning all above activities;
7. Jazzercise;
8. Physical Therapy for sore knee;
9. Osteopath for sore knee;
10. Planning trip to USA (July 24 - Aug 14);
11. Signing kids up for summer camps on two continents;
12. Discovering originally-planned summer camp no longer exists;
13. Finding new camps for same time period;
14. Day trip to Versailles with boys;
15. Tour of Monmartre;
16. Sending two older boys on two different extended field trips;
17. Two-day trip to Epernay (Champagne region), with accompanying winery tours;
18. Watching R be a clown (and gymnast) in the circus;
19. Lying in the middle of a field of rapseed grass;

More, but I have a request to play/teach backgammon. I'll post pictures from the month soon.

Flower Happy

2009-05-19T07:30:00.008-05:00

Last Friday I went to Giverny with two other women from my older kids' school. I was very excited to be invited, and to be able to say yes. I've been here for ten (eleven!?) months. I'm starting to feel comfortable enough to explore more. (Of course, it helps to have someone else drive.)

Giverny is the place where Claude Monet lived, gardened and did many of his more famous paintings. It is a place filled with flowers and with light.

I am not a photographer normally, but I really had fun trying to make good pictures from this stunning garden. You can't not take pictures here. Tell me what you think...

Looking out the bedroom window from his maison.

Puff ball.

Two flowers growing together.

Irises are my all-time favorite flower.

They smelled as wonderful as they looked.

My friend Laurie appreciating a Japanese Maple.

On THE Bridge.

Looking off THE bridge.

Another bridge.

Another bridge across the water. Apparently the lillies bloom in July and August. I'd like to go again, and bring the boys & T to see it.

I think they'd like the bugs too.

And other growing things.

Tania & Laurie & the Weeping Willow.

Gotta remember to look up too. These were above us.

This amazing flower, grows from...

These cones that resemble pinecones! They came in every color of the sunset - red, pink, orange, purple, peach!

More irises.

Don't know what these are, but I like how I caught the light.

There I am with Laurie, along the garden path.

This is a better picture of the path.

I thought the slug was cool too - hanging by his own slime.

Another iris.

It had just rained, and water droplets were on everything.

If you enlarge this, you can see the bumble-bee flying up into the flower. They all but disappeared inside.

Spring in France

2009-05-14T07:37:00.004-05:00

It occurs to me that if I want people to read my blog, I ought to post occasionally. Or something. Anyway, without further ado, here are pictures in no particular order. Yes, I know I need a new camera.

This is A. I don't remember what he was building, but he was VERY proud. A photo was requested & provided.

J & R have found a partially built tree house in the forest nearby. They have taken it upon themselves to continue the project. As you can see, they have added a number of ties, and many branches. T says to point out to Aunt Barbara the excellent use they have made of potholder-making kit you provided to R on his 6th birthday. Good they're getting some use.

This is R during his report on Mexico. He worked VERY hard on it, and was VERY proud of himself. For "International Day," the second-graders prepared a quiz for the parents, asking questions about various countries. That is R's question: "How do they say 'chewing gum' in Mexico?" (Answer: chicle).

Lilacs growing in our yard. I love them. T thinks they stink. But since I'm the one home most of the day, I get to bring them inside as I please. Fortunately for him, the roses are now blooming, so I guess I'll pick those next. (Our yard continues to delight!)

Playing with the camera. I love how lilacs are actually a whole bunch of little flowers, rather than just one big one. Wonder if that's what makes them smell so strongly?

In the fall, I collected nuts & berries from the neighborhood. There are so many things blooming, I thought I'd try doing it again, but with flowers.

On Mother's Day, I celebrated by leaving the kids at home in T's care, and visiting the part of the city called Montmartre with a (new) friend. This is one of the re-stored windmills that the Moulin Rouge is modeled after.

We went to Montmartre with a tour guide, who told us a number of wonderful stories. One was about this man, walking through a wall. Apparently, he wasn't very bright, and accidentally divested himself of the ability to walk through walls mid-stride. Oops.

At the top of the hill is the famous Sacre Couer, with throngs & throngs of people. I remembered this from my second trip to Europe, as a teenager backpacking. This day they were singing Bob Dylan songs on the steps overlookign the city. I remember Beatles songs. My friend wondered why they don't sing in French. Dunno.

Drum roll, please...

2009-05-04T07:32:00.002-05:00

The title of my book will be:

Peace in Paper: A radical step-by-step guide for embracing organization as a path to serenity

Now I get to work on the back cover copy, and then back to the table of contents again. (For the few of you who don't know... I've been working on this book for eight years.) The end is in sight. Hooray!

Cool Stuff

2009-05-02T15:20:00.004-05:00

I just read the coolest article. I love my Fast Company magazine because it keeps me up on what's happening in the world, trend-wise. I learned about Twitter long before anyone started doing it.

One of the things I really liked is that someone decided to do it, long before there was any way to make money off of it - it just seemed cool. This is what happens when you experiment with things. Way cool!

On another note, I am working on my book again. The title I'm noodling over is this:

Peace in Paper: A step-by-step guide for using organization to find serenity and manifest dreams

I know it's too long, but it's getting there. Comments welcome.

Bonus Pictures

2009-04-30T15:27:00.002-05:00

Things that make me happy...

Toenail polish that changes color in the sun.

Purchased last year in Hawaii. But this is my first time on the beach since then.

Thing that makes me unhappy: Stupid thing I can't clean off of my camera.

Home again, Home again, Jiggety Jig

2009-04-30T15:20:00.002-05:00

There is something wonderful about coming home after a vacation for the first time (in a new location). Suddenly you remember that HOME is wherever you feel comfortable. Even if it's not where you think it is.

As much as I liked being in Spain, and LOVED being able to talk to people (I speak Spanish), it was not home.

I like coming back here, and knowing where everything is. I like knowing where the kids will be going, and knowing when I'd get a break. (Vacations are wonderful, but I end up being with the kids MORE, and still arranging for everyone to eat).

I like my own stuff. I like my own neighborhood. "My" Femme du Legumes" (the lady who sells vegetables). "My" boulangerie (fresh bread!) "My" other boulangerie (best croissants in town). "My" habits.

Apparently I have some now. Cool.

Trying to post more...

2009-04-26T08:29:00.004-05:00

Bubbas. (Brothers in Cajun).

Two boys overlooking a drainage pipe. Fascinating.

Caves, as seen from a boat tour.

Guess how many pictures had to be taken to get one decent one? Go on. Guess.

Four boys on a boat. J towers over the others.

Action shot of R, falling into the water, off of the boogie board. Ignore the sudoku player in the background.

A kiss from my youngest. Salty and yummy.

Same child being a "Rock Star!"

Listening to the Wind

2009-04-22T02:05:00.003-05:00

Yesterday I was in a yucky mood. First day of cycle and all that. The kids were getting wild, and I sent them outside. J asked if he could take R to the forest pathway at the end of the street. I knew the younger kids would want to go along too (and he's not quite ready to watch all of them). So I went with them.

And boy, did I need it. Way more than they did. {{Deep Breath}}
We walked slowly as the path disappeared. We looked at flowers and bugs. As we got further in, I told the boys (the littles - the biggers had long ago abandoned us) to be quiet and listen.

It took a few tries, but we finally did it. The wind started behind us up the hill, whooshed past where we were sitting, then continued to roll down the hill. We could see the leaves quaking and branches swaying.

After awhile we could hear birds and bugs, and possibly lizards crawling through the undergrowth. We watched ants and spiders and butterflies and beetles.

We collected sticks and looked at their shapes and examined fallen bark and pine needles. A decided we needed to build a nest for the birds, so we put the sticks down in a circle, and put a pine cone inside. On the way back we touched flower petals, leaves and grasses.

I needed that.

4 Things Meme

2009-04-18T11:15:00.006-05:00

Four names that people call me
1. Rachel
2. Mom
3. Maman
4. Cutie

Four jobs I have had
1. Demo Princess
2. Personal Assistant
3. Janitor
4. Assistant Claims Adjuster

Four movies I would watch (or have watched) more than once
1. Princess Bride
2. Clueless
3. Dirty Dancing
4. Rocky Horror Picture Show

Four books I would read (or have read) more than once
1. Almost every book by Anne McCaffery
2. Harry Potter (all seven volumes)
3. The Four Fold Way - Angeles Arrien
4. The Cat in the Hat and The Cat in the Hat Comes Back

Four places I have lived
1. Garches, France
2. Sugar Land, Texas
3. Lake Charles, Louisiana
4. San Miguel de Allende, Guanajuato, Mexico

Four places I have visited
1. Costa Brava, Spain (I'm here now)
2. St. Neots, England
3. Island of Sant Maarten/Saint Martin
4. Tokyo, Japan

Four places I'd rather be right now
1. On the airplane with T.
2. Other than that, I'm good.
3.
4.

Four of my favorite foods
1. Hamachi Sushi (copying Brian here)
2. Panaang Curry (with Shrimp)
3. Salad Bar at Whole Foods
4. Onion Soup Gratinee (at Le Pressoir restaurant on the island of Sant Maarten)

Four living persons I admire, look up to and/or try to emulate
1. T
2. M&D
3. Marian Head
4. Chris Jordan

Four items that mean something to me
1. Paper Mache Duck
2. Molly the Clown
3. Pennies from Heaven
4. Sabbath Candlesticks

Four things I'm lousy at (and/or would like to learn)
1. Understanding French
2. Speaking (Pronouncing) French
3. Saying "no thank you" to dessert
4. Meditating on a daily basis

Four things I'm really good at
1. Coordinating the needs of a large family
2. Recognizing what I need and want (and for others too)
3. Finding and wearing cool jewelry
4. Surrounding myself with people who can help me (and who love me)

Four things I am looking forward to this year
1. Teaching Jazzercise
2. Finishing writing my book (that I started in 2001)
3. Going on a trip without kids
4. Visiting friends/familiar places in Houston & Denver (July/August)
5. Turning 40

Four things I have strong opinions about
1. Broken bones heal faster than broken spirits
2. Children need both freedom and discipline
3. I created everything in my world (not by molding it, but by noticing, attending to, and choosing it).
4. We all create our lives.

RETURN DIRECTIONS (copied verbatim)

Feel free to do this even if I was rude enough not to tag you in the note itself!Now, here's what you're supposed to do, if you want to:
Copy and paste this into a new note
Erase my answers and type in your answers
Add your own question/s if you want to
Tag me back so I can read your lists

The theory is that each of us will learn a lot of little facts (some previously unknown) about our friends and loved ones. If nothing else, the exercise will stave off the boredom and ennui for another 20 minutes or so.

Je nes parle hablar pas trois lenguas!

2009-04-14T02:49:00.002-05:00

Right now I am in a town called Begur on the Costa Brava area of Spain. We are staying in a villa that we found through VRBO. My folks are here too, having arrived in Barcelona earlier in the week.

Back in 1987, I lived in Mexico, went to school and learned to speak Spanish. For four of the last five years, I've used it to communicate with my housekeeper, and others in Houston, Texas.

In the last year, I've used Spanish to influence my learning of French. The languages are very similar.

Now that I am in a country where Spanish is the main language (well, Catalan anyway), I have discovered I can't speak it at all any more. I keep coming up with French words when I try to communicate in Spanish.

And then I try to correct myself, and mix up my English. Every time I try to say "Excuse me," it comes out in French, and I CANNOT get my Spanish accent back. And at the end, when I try to apologize for being so confusing, I say "Desole. I mean pardon. I mean excuse moi. Oh hell."

And I can't keep from adding "sil vous plait" on the end of every request.

So now, I can't speak in three languages! Arrgh!

In the last two weeks...

2009-04-14T02:40:00.004-05:00

Oops. Sorry about the long delay in posting. No particular reason. Just life. Yes, my last post was a downer. But it was just a bad day, not a bad month. And, yes I realize that I don't actually know what was said to me. Anyway, it's in the past.

What have I been doing for the past two weeks? Hmmm. One thing I did was to finally use the anger and frustration I've had to spur me to action... I hired a friend who knows the lay of the land around here to help me get things done! Her first assignment is to find a place to Jazzercise that works long term.

And I guess that's what I've been up to. Trying to make Jazzercise work here for me, and for others. With only four people signed up regularly, if they can't come, it's hard to have class. And the schedule I've made doesn't really work for me either.

But it IS coming together. And it IS fun. I DO love being an instructor.

The other thing I've been doing is taking a cooking class. On one hand, it is WONDERFUL! I am learning so much, and the other women in the class are delightful.

The frustrating part is the choices of recipes... everything we've made so far has been incredibly heavy with either cream/cheese/fat or meat-intensive. Stuff that I try not to eat too much of. I'm following directions exactly the first time, and making notes on how to make something lighter in the future. (But it's NOT FRENCH to use low-fat milk instead of full cream). Oh well, I'm learning.

Not all Sunshine and Flowers

2009-03-29T10:25:00.002-05:00

Today I got the chance to wander in the local forest with just the older boys. It was supposed to be one-on-one with R, but J tagged along. It was okay for awhile, but then J found something he just HAD to show R. So off they went.

I found a moss covered stump to rest on while waiting. I closed my eyes. When I opened them, a dog was sniffing nearby. I held out my hand for it to smell, thinking it would be okay to say hi. The dog jumped up barking and got in my face. I don't know if it was going to bite me or not, but it really scared me.

It's owners were nearby, and one of them spoke to the dog. The other one spoke to me (in French, of course). I didn't understand the words, but it was NOT an apology, and included the word "Permission," like it was my fault the dog jumped on me, because I had said it was okay.

I was PISSED! What kind of a person watches their dog jump on someone, then blames them for not defending themselves better?

Afterwards, I started crying. What is it about this place that makes people such jerks? Just because I don't speak the language doesn't mean I'm an idiot.

I've been here nine months now. Day to day I do all right. But some days I am really homesick to be in a place I understand. Where I can communicate. Where I can ask for what I want and need. Where I can sit on a tree stump in peace.

Museums & Cooking - What's Good about Paris

2009-03-28T14:32:00.006-05:00

I've been online reading other peoples' blogs. It occurred to me (after an hour or so)... Hmmm. Maybe I ought to write something. Gee, ya' think? Somehow I've just not gotten around to it lately. Let me see if I can give a reasonable update. So, let the rambling begin...

On Thursday, none of the women who regularly attend my Jazzercise class could come, so I cancelled it and went to the Musee d'Orsay instead. This is a museum that is dedicated to French art (as opposed to the Louvre that has art from around the world).

This is the place that houses a very large collection of the Impressionist painters like Van Gogh, Renoir, Degas & Manet. I have two thoughts about what I saw...

1. If no one had told me that these are the grand masters, I could see mistaking some of it for high school painting 101. Like, "my kid could have painted that." On the other hand, I LOVED it. This is the museum I was remembering from my trip here with my parents twenty-odd years ago. About time I found it again.

2. This is an excellent museum in which to have a tour guide. It is very helpful to have someone knowledgeable explain to you what was such a big deal about the Impressionists - what came before them, and why they were so different. (For instance, didja know you could paint an orgy and have it be acceptable as long as you made it look historic and included a couple of frowning onlookers?) I highly recommend Paris Walks if you're here for a visit.

Also, I am finally taking a cooking class. This is the MOST fun I've had since I've been here. I have actually cooked Coq au Vin, Tarte aux Poireaux, Coquilles St. Jacques, Tarte Tatin aux Peche, Cassoulet and Tarte au Saumon Fume. And not only that, I could do it again.

The teacher sends out an ingredient list, we each buy what's on it, then meet in one anothers' homes. The teacher shows up, gives instructions and supervises as we each attempt to follow the recipe. While the recipes are great and yummy, her instruction is wonderful too. The things she says in an off-hand way, are almost more useful than the specific thing she's teaching.

My biggest "aha" moment, was when she said (basically), "leave it alone." The more you mess with it (stir), the longer it will take to cook. Let it be. Quit trying to "make" it happen. Wow. Sometimes I'm a really slow learner. (Hasn't god been trying to teach me the same thing?)

What else. Hmmm. Even though I am learning how to cook, and I'm enjoying the food, the kids haven't been all that excited. (They did like the cassoulet). I have been getting very frustrated about having to cook something EVERY DAMN NIGHT! And make sure there are appropriate breakfasts, lunches and snacks. I'm getting tired of it.

I have decided I'm ready to have the kind of help that doesn't just clean, but helps prepare meals and plays with the kids. I have a gal now (that just cleans), but I am not enamoured with her. I want someone whom I will be delighted to see - someone who takes care of me a little. I am ready to have help that helps.

Okay. This is three or four posts in one. So I'm considering myself caught up. What's up with you?

Everybody Dance Now

2009-03-21T03:21:00.002-05:00

Wanna see something cool? My kid is a dancer too! (Well, there is more than one kid in the video... But one is the dancer).

Saint Chapelle

2009-03-19T14:23:00.006-05:00

On Tuesday I had to go to the US Embassy to request an "attestation" of my Drivers License, so I can exchange it with the prefecture for a French one. The appointment wasn't until the afternoon, so I took the time to follow the advice of my father on what to "not miss" while I'm here.

Sainte Chapelle is supposed to be the best repository of original stained glass in all of Europe (the world?) It was built in the mid 13th century by King Louis IX, who was apparently a very devout guy. (As Kings go, I guess).

Anyway, to get there, you go to the Isle de Cite in the middle of Paris, then walk all the way around the Palais de Justice (which has a bunch of armed officers around every entrance). Wait in line awhile, let them scan your bag and walk through a metal detector... then you finally get to the entrance to the museum.

The lower level was apparently built for the rif-raf (though actually quite beautiful and elaborately painted). You climb up one of the sets of stairs at one end of the chapel. As you come up and out, you see this...

It is truly breath-taking. You can go to the linked website to get more info if you want to. Here's my take though...

The first five sets of windows tell the stories of the first five books of the bible. But as it goes around (there are 14 sections), it becomes the story of Jesus. In the latter sections, it tells the story of how the French Kings are somehow direct descendants of the Jews. I got a little confused there. Somehow I missed how the Promised Land moved to Europe.

Stunning, though. Here is the picture I took...

And, a bonus picture of my biggest & my littlest. Getting along. And liking it.

Pictures, Now With Added Video...

2009-03-16T07:24:00.003-05:00

... because for some reason, I don't write any more. Must be because of the exciting life I lead.

R can often be seen here. That's the 4th Harry Potter book he's reading. He cna barely lift it. I have readers in my family. Hooray!

Pay no attention to the fact that I am also on the computer behind them. I am sure I have the same expression on my face. Just kidding. I hope.

But we do get out some. These are at the Parc St. Cloud near us. Apparently we found the "Ropes Course" they have. After about 20 minutes, we were chased away. Not sure exactly what they said, but it had something to do with harnesses and liability. Oops.

Speaking of reading, I've got another one up & coming. He's spelling too - with assistance. It's fun to see his creativity when it comes to making words. And other shapes with letter magnets.

E is fascinated by all the scooters/motorcycles around. I'm not sure where this came from, but he says/sings "Happy Motorcycle!" and then runs around in circles (or down the street on the way to school) making motorcycle noises. I don't know how to make it right side up.

And last, but not least, is R. With his mowhawk. He is SO happy with it, his grin touches his ears on either side. The french woman cutting his hair just kept shaking her head...

And then yesterday, we went to a Purim festival. They had face painting. So, here he is with a green mowhawk, and "Indian" face paint. Apparently this is his "Evil Zombie" face to go with it. And to think I once worried about this kid following the crowd too much. Ha!

March Forth!

2009-03-04T03:45:00.002-06:00

Back when I used to work for a living, and ran a business, we (I and others in my industry) used to use March 4 as a marketing promotion day - i.e., today is the day to MARCH FORTH into your new (more organized) life, to take bold action toward something big.

Now, I am not trying to promote anything, and am mostly just hanging out from day-to-day. I woke up remembering it was March 4th, but I'm not really in a "GO FOR IT!" place.

An aside... This reminds me of a past business associate who one day got the advice to be TEN TIMES MORE ENTHUSIASTIC than she normally was. It was really irritating.

Anyway, where was I? Oh yeah, being bold. Not really feeling it. (Sorry, Lisa).

I'm thinking, maybe you all could give me some advice. If you were here, what would you not miss? What, to you, would be the greatest thing about living just-outside-of Paris? What can I do (and blog about), to allow you to live vicariously through me?

Maybe I can regain (some) enthusiasm through you. Thanks.

The France Fifteen

2009-03-02T06:55:00.002-06:00

Eeek. I got on the scale today, and it wasn't pretty. My friend (who has lived in at least three different countries), likens it to the "Freshman Fifteen," i.e., the weight you gain your first time away from home in college.

She points out that everything is new and different, and whatever good habits you may have had, go flying out the window in the face of everything being so foreign. You reach for comfort foods, and easily-recognizable foods, and easily-prepared foods.

This is not an excuse. But it does explain the problem. I have definitely been eating way more bread, cheese, chocolate croissants (mmmm), and quiches than ever before in my life. They are available, easy & inexpensive. Not to mention delicious. (It's fine when you travel here for a week's vacation. After seven months though, it adds up).

But.

This is NOT WORKING. I worked too hard to get to a handle on my weight to lose it now. It is time to get back into shape and take care of myself again. Here's how I'm going to do it:

1. Slow Down. I'm going to eat my meals sitting down (not standing at the counter), and take time to enjoy the food. Whether or not the kids do.
2. More Vegetables, less bread. Cheese tastes just as good on salad as it does on bread. Really.
3. Less Desserts. I've been eating dessert-y things as snacks. And then eating dessert later. And telling the kids they can't because "one sweet thing a day is enough." Time to follow my own advice.
4. Jazzercise! I've scheduled two classes per week through the month of March (still looking for a permanent location). Teaching twice per week, and practicing another two or three times per week should help me regain my strength.

And that's it. I know there are a host of other, detailed things I could be doing, but I think these four things by themselves will help immensely. I'm making this public because it helps me make the commitment. Feel free to ask me, nudge me, cheer me on and/or make faces at me. I'll keep you posted.

Sick of Sick!

2009-02-24T04:26:00.002-06:00

It's some kind of curse. The moment vacation time rolls around, half (or more) of this household gets sick. E still is not completely over his bronchitis. J & I were diagnosed with "angine(?)," which I'm pretty sure is strep throat. That was last week, at the beginning of the smaller boys' two-week vacation.

Then, this week (when everyone is off), J wakes up with a fever, after three days of antibiotics. We put him on a bus/train anyway for his ski trip. (He's being very well taken care of, and his teacher is emailing me. He is skiing and feeling fine now).

Sunday, A and R woke up with fevers. We doled out ibuprofen and hoped for the best. Nope. Monday morning I took them to the doctor too. R has the same diagnosis as J & me. A has something else. Something viral.

So today, Tuesday, R & A still have fevers and just want to lay around. E, on the other hand, is perking up. So he's bouncing off the walls, while the other two just want to cuddle.

And this morning, to top it all off, A threw up into his cereal bowl. Which grosses out R (who is already naseous), and tickles E, who screams with laughter, and has to narrate the whole thing... "A threw up!" (at top volume).

I've already had to cancel two playdates this week. I was hoping for a babysitter tomorrow, but she can't do it. I am going stir crazy here. Help!

25 Things About Me Meme

2009-02-21T10:25:00.005-06:00

1. I just discovered that this is my 101st post. It's also probably going to be my longest.

2. I didn't know what a meme was until recently. I'm still not entirely sure exactly what it means. But it's going around and everyone is doing it. I didn't want to be left out.

3. I'm living in the fashion capital of the world and I know NOTHING about fashion. This cat knows more than me.

4. Typing is really difficult with a three-year-old in your lap singing along to Chicken Little.

5. I traveled in Europe when I was 14 with my parents. We spent a week in Club Med in Switzerland (for a conference), then went on a tour bus through France with a bunch of adults, and two little kids. Guess who I got to "babysit" the whole time. My older brother didn't come with us.

6. I traveled in Europe again when I was 16/17. I spent my 17th birthday with a group of English-speaking teenagers/20-somethings on an island in Greece. They gave me a t-shirt and an ice-cream cone. Probably my best birthday, ever. (So far, anyway... my 40th could be great too!)

7. I have never dyed or permed my hair. Tried to once, but it didn't take. When it's long, it's wavy or curly, depending on length and location.

8. It's starting to turn grey now, but I don't mind. I earned every grey hair I own. My mom started turning grey in her 30s too. If I age as gracefully as she has (and as my grandmother did), I'll be very happy.

9. My grandmother was named Pearl. If I'd had a daughter, Pearl would have been her middle name. Her first name would have been Lessa. Lessa Pearl. I love that and am sad I'll never get to use it. Oh well.

10. If you follow the reference above, you will learn about my all-time favorite fictional world. I have read every single book, and I believe every short story as well. I wanted to name my oldest boy Jaxom, but settled for something that sounded a lot like it. I still resent having been introduced to the books out of order. (But I'm over it).

11. These 25 things are a lot longer and more detailed than I'd planned. That may be a theme for me - putting more detail into things than absolutely necessary - but with (I hope) interesting outcomes.

12. My brother's girlfriend was my friend first. When they broke up (20+ years ago), I lost track of her. Now they're back together, and I get to have her as a friend again. Hooray! She's the one who inspired me to write this meme. Hi J!

13. I started reading blogs about three years ago. My mother (we call her techno-granny) gave me my first link. It was to this mom-of-three-boys, whom she met at a Colorado Authors League meeting. In addition to her, the blogs I read (almost) every day are, in no particular order, WouldaCouldaShoulda, Notes from the Trenches, Mom to the Screaming Masses, Chookooloonks, and The Bold Soul. These women inspire me, not only to write, but to take time to appreciate my kids, my life, and the beauty around me.

14. Until recently, I hadn't read a newspaper regularly in over fifteen years. I never watch news programs, and rarely go to news websites. In all that time, I don't feel as if I've missed out on anything really important. I figure someone will tell me if there is anything that will affect me directly. So far, I've been right.

15. I just started taking the International Herald Tribune. I felt, for the first time, in a long time, that I'd like to know what's going on in the world. Something about being an American in a foreign country, I do not wish to appear stupid and/or uninformed.

16. However, I find most of the news distasteful and irrelevant. A Political Science professor in college told me I could learn everything I needed to know about the world by reading the editorials. I still follow that advice.

17. I read the comics religiously. The two I never miss are Non Sequitur and Luann.

18. I also read a bunch of magazines and newsletters. I often don't know what's happening on a day-to-day basis, but I understand trends. Here's a list of the ones I have right now: The Sun Magazine, Inc., Fast Company, Working Mother, Mothering, More. There's probably a couple that I'm missing.

19. I'm getting tired of making links. I'm still not all that great at technology stuff. I really want a personal assistant who will do everything I tell him/her to do, and make it all look pretty.

20. I love business. I love seeing how individual people make decisions to do something in their corner of the world, make something better, fulfill a need, solve a problem, and then go out and do it. I believe businesses impact our world far more than any politics or politician.

21. I'm a great speller. I can figure out how to spell almost anything. If I typed as good as I spelled, I'd never use a spell checker. Unfortunately, I'm a lousy typist.

22. I never, ever, ever, in my entire life, imagined I would have four children. It never crossed my mind. I always thought I'd have two - a boy and a girl, just like in my family. Now, of course, I wouldn't have it any other way.

23. Something else I never imagined I would do, is teach any kind of physical exercise. I was a bookworm as a kid, never played a sport, got overweight in college and never really took it off. The fact I'm a certified Jazzercise instructor boggles my mind. I never was coordinated or graceful. I'm still not that graceful, but I do my best.

24. I have had an amazing number of incredible teachers, mentors, friends and advisors in my life. I feel incredibly blessed to have their (your) support and love over the years. I am one of the luckiest people I know in this respect.

25! When I was a little girl, I wanted to be a pilot when I grew up. I was steadfast in this desire from the time I was about seven, to the time I was a teenager. Then someone told me there were lots of other ways to get paid to travel. I'm still working on the getting paid part, but I've travelled well.

Done! Your turn. If you haven't made your list yet, consider yourself tagged. I want to see your 25 Things. Send me a link!

2009-02-17T08:18:00.006-06:00

I had every intention of blogging a lot this month. But somehow it's gotten away from me. And today, in lieu of an actual post, I'm going to give you pictures instead.

This is my attempt at art. (I'm being inspired by Karen at Chookooloonks). Actually, we were walking to school, and it was cold, and I was just so excited to see a bloom, I had to take a picture of it. Spring may actually arrive someday!

Is it any wonder that people ask me if they're twins? How can two children who are so different be so similar too? (I love this shot).

On Sunday, I had this bright idea that we could all go on a (guided) walking tour with Paris Walks. I figured the older kids would get a kick out of the underground tour, and the littles could just play and wander around.

Ha. E lost it before we even started. I gave up on the idea and we wandered around the park by ourselves instead. (See next two pictures). But in case you are interested, this is the Liberty Flame, a replica of the one on the Statue of Liberty in the US (that the French gave to USA). It's also just above the tunnel where Princess Diana died, and still has memorials and flowers around it today.

Boys playing at the park with the Eiffel Tower in the background. J has a pea shooter and is shooting bbs around the park. (Fortunately, not AT anyone other than pigeons).

J the Giant. (That's the jar of bbs in his hand. He would pour them into his mouth, then spit them through a straw. Lovely.)

This is Gaiatree (probably spelled wrong). She's my friend's 8 month old girl. And I get to hold her at least once a week. And sometimes twice. She smells as yummy as she looks.

(And to answer the question I'm sure you're wondering... No. No more for me. I just have to borrow babies now).

OK, It's Alright with Me*

2009-02-12T12:43:00.004-06:00

*A song I've just put into my Jazzercise set - way cool.

Actually, there is something going on I'm noticing. Here's what it is... I've always known that I'm a ridiculously optimistic person - to the point where I forget bad things ever happening (just block them from my mind), and always look at the bright side.

Which is fine, most of the time. And if it's not, how would I know, anyway?

Lately though, with the economy heading south and other things, it seems sometimes like I'm the only person in the world who is NOT struggling. Which is nice for me, but it limits my conversations somewhat.

I don't like to have "awfulizing" conversations where we talk about how bad everything is. I find them boring at least, and unpleasant at worst. And yet, I keep finding myself in these discussions and end up sitting mute. (Which, if you know me, you know is really strange!)

I really just want to say to people, "yeah, I get it's bad... But isn't there anything good we could talk about?"

Photos

2009-02-02T02:50:00.005-06:00

This is R & J on "Crazy Hair Day" at school. Can you see the blue streaks?

And the backsides, of course...

A is learning to read. We have read The Cat in the Hat Comes Back every night for the last three weeks. Now, he's reading it to us. Not sure how much is reading and how much of it is memorization, but he is very excited. I caught him looking through this book on the stairs. (Cool photo, huh!)

The best laid plans...

2009-02-02T02:46:00.004-06:00

Well, today was going to be my first day teaching Jazzercise. Even if it was unofficial. See, I even made space in my living room.

Unfortunately, the weather had other plans.

It took me the better part of an hour to drive the kids to school and get back home. I've been getting emails and phone calls all morning from people who wanted to come, but aren't going to. I don't blame them. If it was me, I wouldn't have come either.

There's always next week.

Things I can do now, that I couldn't do six months ago

2009-01-31T09:29:00.002-06:00

How's that for a ridiculously long blog post title? Let's see...

1. Drive. In the suburban areas anyway. I drove into Paris once. On a Sunday afternoon. It took me as long to drive in as it did to find a parking space.
2. Ride the bus. When the trains go on strike, alternatives are necessary. This week the whole city went on strike. But I still made it in to visit with friends. Which brings me to...
3. Park. This is the home of the SmartCar for a reason. There is never any parking anywhere. When I go to pick my kids up from their school, I almost always park at least partially on the sidewalk. It is the only way.
4. Grocery shop. Here it's a combination of open-air markets, small grocers and on-line grocers with free (or cheap) home delivery. Guess which one I like best.
5. See a movie. At the movie theatre. Take the train in to meet T at his office. Go up to the theatre. Figure out which movies are in English (V.O.S.T. stands for something along the lines of voice original subtitled). Which is fine, except for the parts in the movie that are in a different language than English are subtitled in French. Oops.
6. Order lunch. That the children will actually eat. Pomme frites, anyone? And, my kids are expanding their horizons too. The older two, at least, are willing to try new things.
7. Teach Jazzercise. My unofficial start date is Monday, in my living room. By next month, I will have an official class and a real location. Whoa.
8. Understand French. A little. I can follow directions to the toilet or the metro. I can order food and buy clothing. I can manage to compliment someone without causing a ten-minute conversation. But it's not pretty.

I'm sure there's more. But this is what comes to mind for now. Happy January. It's done now.

Free to a Good Home....

2009-01-25T04:52:00.002-06:00

This week, I read a post by a sister American-in-Paris (although she's here to stay). She has this lovely cat...

... who is in need of a new home. If you're here, and a cat-lover, and don't have anyone in the family who is vehemently opposed to it, maybe you can be her adoptive mother. Link here for the whole story, and more pictures.

For more information, visit Lisa's blog, The Bold Soul. Actually, visit anyway. She's a great (and inspiring) writer.

JAZZERCISE - Do You Wanna Dance (Avec Moi)?

2009-01-24T00:51:00.002-06:00

If you've been reading here since September, you know that I have been planning on teaching Jazzercise classes here in France since before I arrived. It’s coming up on February now, and I think it’s high time to get started.

I’m a little nervous though. I’m not sure where to hold classes, when is the right time, or how many people are likely to show up. (Not to mention, I’ve never done this before and I’m not in quite the fabulous shape I was when I did it four times per week).

Regardless... I am committed to getting started. If you are in France (and didn't get my email already), please answer the following questions in the comments section:

1. If I offered a class at 9:30 a.m. on Mondays & Thursdays in/near
Saint Cloud (within a ten minute drive from the American School), would you come?
2. Would you come regularly, or occasionally?
3. If I could only offer the classes at 11:30 a.m., would you still come?
4. If I started on February 2, would you join me?

Please let me know of your interest level. I’m not exactly sure how it will work out, but to those of you who respond, I will let you know. Thanks so much for your support.

Also, if you know of an available place to use (think dance studios and/or large basements), please forward me the information.

Again, thanks. Have a fabulous day!

Ouch.

2009-01-20T09:54:00.003-06:00

Yesterday, on the way to the museum with T, I fell down the stairs in the Metro station. My foot slipped out from under me, and I went down on my butt. Then I slid down one step. It wasn't much, in the way of actual damage. But, man am I sore today. Yuck.

On a brighter note though, we finally walked to school again. We've been driving due to the cold weather. But I'd finally had enough. I need to walk. And no one cried. And E went right into his classroom and gave his teacher a bisou (kiss). Yay... Life continues to become NORMAL. (Oh that makes me SO happy!)

P.S. President Obama. Way cool.

Doing the tourist thing...

2009-01-19T11:01:00.008-06:00

I am finally making a point of getting out and seeing the things I want to see here. In the last week, I've done not one, but TWO sightseeing adventures.

First, I went back to Chartres. It said on the website that the labyrinth was open on Fridays (chairs cleared away, so you can walk). What it didn't say on the website was that it only happens on Fridays between Easter and Toussaint.

So. No labyrinth walk. But the tower was open. So I paid my seven Euros and I climbed. See...

I was up at the top of this.

I really liked all the animals depicted.

And the guy.

I kept thinking I ought to buy the book or go on a tour and learn more about this or something. On the other hand, I WILL go back.

And then today, T took the day off, and we went to l'Orangerie - a museum dedicated to the impressionists. While I only took one picture (to show the immensity of the SIZE of the paintings by Monet), really there were two pictures that really make me go WOW!

Here is my picture (there were four paintings per room times two rooms). That's T sitting there. And it's only about half of the painting. They're HUGE.

Here are the ones I connect with...

Picasso - The Embrace

Renoir - Two Girls at the Piano

Dawn of a New Day?

2009-01-14T08:21:00.002-06:00

Or just a pretty morning?

Yesterday, when driving the small boys to school, the sky was on fire with oranges and pinks and purples. Even they were impressed.

I pulled into my normal "parking space" (only spot within 100 yards of the school in which my vehicle will fit - on the sidewalk), and looked up. Saw this:

As I walked the boys from the car, we could see that it was a full arch across the entire sky. G.E.O.R.G.O.U.S.! I kept pointing it out to people ("regardez l'arch du colores.") Incredible.

And short lived. It was gone by the time I returned to my car.

The timing though, was interesting. The rainbow was yesterday. Today marks six months of living in France. (We arrived July 14).

So, should I count this as a sign of good things to come?

How much???

2009-01-11T09:34:00.003-06:00

Note for future reference: Do NOT try to develop film in France.

I was at the shopping mall looking for winter coats for the two younger boys. We passed by a one-hour photo development place, and I remembered two rolls of film I'd been carrying around (for months!) in my purse.

So I dropped them off and went on my merry way.

We found jackets and went back to pick up the film. I started to dig out the change (I like to get rid of coins first, as they're very heavy), I didn't really notice the price.

But then I did... 45.96 Euros. That's about $62. And the pictures weren't that good.

Thank goodness everything else is digital!

Dream. On.

2009-01-11T02:40:00.004-06:00

I had a dream a couple of nights ago that has stayed with me. The specifics aren't important (and I'm not sure I want to post the details), but the meaning came through loud and clear...

I am being called to create/manifest structures in my life that not only support the people around me (my family), but that hold me up too. I am ready to have things/people/activities/work in my life which give me energy and allow me to connect with a deeper purpose.

The piece of the dream that most struck me, was how vividly delighted the other person was to see/be with me, how good it feels to be loved unconditionally. I want to create places in my life where that feeling exists for me (and for others, of course).

This feels a little like a carry through from the last post about self-appreciation. I guess I'm looking for even more than that - places where "appreciating others" is the norm, rather than a rarity.

Something I remember from a video of R. Buckminister Fuller - "love comprehnsibly" (not comprehensively), i.e., love so that people "get" it. I want more of that.

Self Appreciation

2009-01-07T03:48:00.003-06:00

My mom, who is normally rather amazing (check her out), reminded me of something this morning... On her weekly newsletter, she pointed out the need for self-appreciation - noticing the things that you do (because they need to be done), and then forget about.

Yesterday was a tough day for me. It was the first day back to school for the kids, and the youngers have pretty much forgotten they ever liked it in the first place. E cried all morning long. A joined in on the walk to school. By the time we got there, I was near tears too. (We couldn't get the car out of the driveway, due to the "snowboarding" of the previous day).

I know it was hard. But at the same time, it's important for the kids to get out of the house. (And lord knows, I need to have the time away from them). Even though it sucked, I did it. And today, they cried less (and I was able to drive), and I expect they'll be back in the swing of school by next week.

What have you done, that no one will thank you for, but ought to be recognized?